#i had a date cancel on me but jokes on them I had enough time to speed run this instead >:)

[elizakai]

Inktober Day 5: Theater Play

[azulpitlane]

american wedding l ln4

summary: lando dating zak brown's daughter leads to a lot of pr disasters, like getting married in vegas

notes: can be read as a part two to boss' daughter or a stand alone

masterlist

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 38,329 others

yourusername wasnt gonna drink tonight but i miss my bf like a mf.

view all comments

user real tbh

user i miss u like a mf. show ur face at a race already queen.

user no cause it's been forever since she went to one and i miss the chaotic content with her and lando

user you know damn well you were gonna drink regardless liked by yourusername

landonorris i miss u more😓 just drop out of uni and come to all my races

zbrownceo excuse me?

landonorris JUST A JOKE! ha ha ha.

user LANDO😭😭

landonorris but i just booked a flight to nyc because of this post btw. see you this weekend😈

yourusername i was about to start crying until i realized what emoji you used😐

oscarpiastri dont we have be at the mtc this weekened??

yourusername SHHHH OSCAH

landonorris yeah oscar shhh

user poor oscar is always getting tag teammed by those two

user lando getting that in-law privilege by skipping important meetings to see his boss' daughter😭

user i love this relationship's dynamic theyre so perfect for each other

f1gossip

23,432 likes

f1gossip Lando and Y/n's Brown's weekend in New York City! It seems Lando skipped his trip to the MTC to be with his girlfriend where they were pictured clubbing and walking around the city multiple times.

view all comments

user IN THE CLURB WE ALL FAM

user he finally met his match lol

user lando is a clingy drunk confirmed✅

user i really want to know what their drunk conversations sound like

user hot take but if she wasnt zaks daughter most of you guys would hate her

user shes making him blow off important meetings so he could be with her? she sounds like a distraction from racing

user girl what- her dad is literally the ceo? if there was an issue im sure he wouldve let them know bffr

user zak brown is probably tired of these two😭

user is partying all they do together?

user no cause she lowkey seems like a bad influence

user i agree🫣 shes always posting herself partying and drinking, thats not wag material

user she might be a pr nightmare but i stand with my canceled wife💜

landonorris

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 820,429 others

landonorris nyc to vegas🛩 aaaand i brought the bad influence with

tagged yourusername

view all comments

user the caption IM-

user nah hes lowkey dissing y/n haters😭

user how did he bag someone 10x cooler than him

user the bottle of alcohol and the vape, she really is ready for vegas

user Y/N'S BACK!!!

yourusername vegas aint ready for us

landonorris no they arent😈

yourusername enough.

user no hate to the other wags but y/n is truly the realest one out of all of them

user fr she truly is just a normal girl in her twenties

oscarpiastri 🙂

yourusername what is that suppose that mean OSCAH!!! my father will hear of this

oscarpiastri ok calm down draco malfoy

user why is there lowkey beef between y/n and oscar LMFAO

yourusername he hates my swag!!!

oscarpiastri she brings a lotttt of energy to the garage when shes here🙂

user im crying at oscars response😭😭😭 hes had enough of yn and lando

user idk if her holding a bottle of alcohol is appropriate to post!

user pls grow up omg

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo and 59,329 others

yourusername postt race partoes >>>>>> the avtual race

view all comments

user THEE party girl

user i need to party with them so bad

user lando.jpg when???

user the typos😭 shes already drunk

user yup theres already videos of her and lando drunkly dancing together all over twitter

user yeah and oscar was in the background of those videos looking miserable LMFAOO

user oh to be a wag partying in vegas with lando

yourusername posted a story

user i voted fall to my knees and cry btw…if you even care

user um this is a random question to ask at 3am…

user what stores are even open rn😭😭

-

oscarpiastri Y/N??? IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU AND LANDO FOR LIKE A HALF AN HOUR AT THE CLUB AND YOURE NOT EVEN HERE??

oscarpiastri if you guys dont pick up your phones i swear to god…

oscarpiastri of course i get stuck as babysitter to the two most drunk people at the party

yourusername heY oscah😊😊 sendingg u my lpcation now cuz we need a witness so come ASAPPPPPP

oscarpiastri WITNESS FOR WHAT?

-

danielricciardo if this means what i think it means, youre both so dead🤣

user babes didnt u just post at the club like an hour ago

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 1,392,321 others

yourusername do u guys thonk my dad will be mad thaT oscar walked me down the aislee?

view all comments

user OH MY GOD??

user mclarens pr team are going to have a rude awakening in the morning😭

user shes never beating the bad influence allegations i fear

user crazy to think that this time last year he was flirting with her through her instagram comments😭

user and now theyre married omg i remember everyone was teasing lando but he truly got the last laugh

carlossainz55 i dont know if i should congralute you guys or be concerned?

user mind you, its almost four in the morning in vegas

danielricciardo getting married is crazy, you should be at the club

yourusername u mak a grrat point! otw now

mclaren we cannot congratulate until the boss says its okay sorry😕

zbrownceo answer your phone.

oscarpiastri sir, i would like it to be known that she blackmailed to be there

yourusername okay snitch!

zbrownceo im not kidding y/n

danielricciardo ouuu youre in trouble

user its so over for them

user zak finally putting his foot down with these two LMFAO

f1gossip

25,532 likes

f1gossip Wedding celebrations at the club! Seems like the newlyweds are back partying after their wedding announcement was made just a few minutes ago. Congrats to them?

view all comments

user everyone is freaking out and theyre literally at the club im cryingg

user "congrats to them?" is literally all of us rn😭

user they are not real omg

user zak is probably blowing up their phones and they do not care at all lmfaooo

user truly winning the idgaf war

user real question is are they getting an annulment once they sober up???

user i really wanna know what zak will make them do

f1gossip

20,329 likes

f1gossip Newly weds update! The two were seen this afternoon leaving Las Vegas with Zak Brown himself. Neither were seen wearing wedding rings, possible divorce?

view all comments

user well that was fun while it lasted

user damn they beat kim kardashians record of the shortest marriage

user at least theyre still dating😭

user they definitely got yelled at lmfaoo

user cant tell if zak is happy or angry that his daughter married norris considering how much he loves him

user oh hes def happy about it but not happy they posted it LOL

user good for him for getting an annulment. shes a mess

user and hes not? bye theyre both messy

landonorris 📍qatar

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 2,424,232 others

landonorris annulment? we're in our honeymoon

view all comments

user oh so theyre fr about this marriage😭

user does bro know theres a race on sunday

user they look so in love im honestly really happy for them

yourusername we beat the fraud marriage allegations💜

mclaren now thats its been approved by the boss, congratulations to the best papaya couple theres ever been🧡

user wow so zak approves! im shocked tbh

user i wish i couldve seen their reactions the morning after the wedding

yourusername ohhh we didnt remember any of it tbh but were happy now!

user LMFAO OMG....

user she finally got her ring!! and here you guys were thinking they got a divorce bc she didnt have one

danielricciardo never thought id see the day

yourusername me neither tbh

landonorris excuse me WHAT

landoupdates

50,242 likes

landoupdates Lando was questioned on his Vegas wedding in new interview.

"We decided not to get any annulment or anything and just keep this Vegas marriage as sort of like a promise for a real one in the future." 🧡

view all comments

user omg😭😭they are too cute

user not to be dramatic but i would honestly cried if they broke up

user no literally they mean everything to me

user "i really do think y/n is the one" DO YOU HEAR ME SOBBING

user he gets so smiley when y/n is brought up ughhh me and WHO

user and to think y/n has haters is crazyyy this man is so in love with her

user if oscar isnt the best man ill riot for him, he was there for the og wedding

user imagining them trying to convince zak to not get a divorce is the cutest but funniest thing ever

-

more notes: has anyone seen anora?? it inspired this haha A FRAUD MARRIAGE!!!

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Clownfall: the Election Cometh

It's a long one, lads. Buckle up, get comfy, but the circus is in town for its final run. Ambient music as you read can be found here or here, take your pick. Get popcorn. Get snacks and water and a blanket.

Are you sitting comfortably?

Wednesday 22nd May

7.12am

Household favourite and queen of our hearts Pippa Crerar of the Guardian (her who did the investigative journalism that revealed PartyGate to the world) reports that UK inflation fell to a mere, paltry 2.3% in April.  The lowest level in three years!  Huzzah! But … still smaller than the decline that was expected. 

Nonetheless, Rishi Sunak and Jeremy Cunt whoops I'm so sorry I meant Cunt haha whoops said it again make a big fuss about how brilliant this news is, and how it shows that they are Good At Maffs after all that trouble with Liz Truss and Kwasi Kwarteng, who defined themselves as being Good At Maffs and then obliterated the economy in a single day.  Remember that! Good times. But hey, look, THIS PM/Grand Vizier combo are great at this! Inflation has fallen! Stop looking at the predicted rate! A fall is still a fall!

Crerar wonders whether people will actually feel better off, though – prices and mortgage rates are still high, after all. Food for thought.

10.04am

Jeremy Hunt is asked on the Today programme whether Sunak will call a general election.

Now, the logic here is that the government is likely to do better in an election if the economy’s improving; which, SunakCunt are now shrieking from the rooftops. So, is now the time? It's a win, and they've had so few of those, but historically people really do like to fall for the right wing = better economy myth... 

BUT – the Tories are doing so very badly in the polls.  Journalists favour the idea of an autumn election.  Tories do better when the weather’s bad, because fewer people go out and vote.

 “Well that’s a matter for the prime minister, it’s not a matter for me,” says Cunt. 

... Well.  Not ruling it out, then? Diddorol.

10.30am

It's Wednesday, aka the date that Tory cabinet ministers have their weekly meeting. They are duly sent the agenda.

There is no mention at all of an election announcement, nor any plan for an election.

Fair enough! 'Twas an idle thought. Plus, it would actually be bad timing from a logistical perspective - David Cameron, Foreign Secretary and Bae of Pigs, is currently flying out to Albania for an important international meeting, and Jeremy Cunt is on TV all day today - ITV next.

12.18pm

Sunak is asked at Prime Minister’s Questions whether he’ll call a general election.  He doesn’t rule it out.

12.56pm

Fun tweet alert!

2.31pm

Pippa Crerar asked Sunak’s press secretary whether he was calling an election.  She refused to comment.

Surely it’s a terrible time to call an election! Everyone hates them!  But suddenly …

A Cabinet meeting is scheduled for 4.15pm.  David Hameron suddenly u-turns in Albania and comes straight back home, his meeting un-met.  Jeremy Cunt cancels his ITV appearance.  The afternoon meeting is cancelled. Number 10 stops responding to journalists.  Manifesto work has stepped up.  Sunak’s chief-of-staff is spotted wearing a suit and tie WHICH IS UNUSUAL.  Senior ministers have spent the last few days doubling down on dividing lines.  And Tory bosses had a meeting this week to discuss how much money they could spend before a summer election.

The UK press sense blood in the water.

3pm

Okay.

There’s something you need to understand:

People suspect Rishi Sunak doesn’t actually want to live in the UK.  He’d prefer to be in California.  He’s here because he’s an MP.

You need to know this to understand this truly historic incident.

Nadine Dorries has produced a good tweet.

...

...

...

No, we all need to sit with this one for a minute

(For the record... to us, that is an excellent joke. But I strongly suspect she wasn't joking and was trying to make a catty accusation instead, which coincidentally appeared like a roast.

Scientists are referring to this as Stopped Clock Syndrome.)

5.17pm

With great dignity, Rishi Sunak stands outside Number 10 and announces a general election on 4 July.

And by “great dignity”, I mean he’s soaked by rain, while “Things Can Only Get Better” plays in the background courtesy of an anti-Tory protestor with a big speaker and a dream; the song adopted by he Labour Party for the 1997 election, where Tony Blair famously won a landslide victory after 18 years of Tory rule. Eventually, the volume of it is raised so high Sunak is, on more than one level, drowned out.

5.37pm

According to Gabriel Pogrund of the Times, Labour can’t believe Number 10 allowed this to happen.

One Labour insider texts: “Umbrellas are woke”

6.06pm

Good tweet alert!

8pm

A later Guardian article reports that Sunak greeted around a hundred Tory activists – still wearing the same rain-soaked trousers from the announcement.

No word at all on why he doesn't have aides capable of fetching him dry trousers. Perhaps those, too, are woke.

8.14pm

A Sky News reporter is at Sunak’s campaign launch.  But, bafflingly, he’s forcibly removed.  Extraordinary scenes

Elanor's Pro Tip: Removing a journalist may not be the best PR move for the start of an election trail.

8.27pm

9.36pm

A GBNews reporter claims that some Tory MPs are trying desperately to replace Sunak as leader in order to call off the general election.  For this to work, they’d need a vote of no confidence before the dissolution of parliament on Thursday 30 May.  Except actually, that would have to happen before the proroguing of parliament on Friday 24 May.

So … this won’t work.  But how very incredible - and hilarious - that they’re trying.

10.39pm

Let's take a look at the evening headlines!

A great start to Sunak’s campaign, with newspapers - including the Tory giant The Telegraph - celebrating the triumphant launch of his campaign:

Well! WHAT a day! Let's see how Thursday goes.

Thursday 23 May

8.00am

The BBC takes a moment to gleefully throw off the shackles of political oppression of the last 12 years to reveal that Rishi Sunak's announcement of a July election, the single most important announcement for a sitting government, the most sensitive and vitally-timed event in their calendar...

Was a total surprise to the rest of the party.

Tory party MPs found out when we did that they were about to have to campaign again. For a snap GE. Three weeks after having just done it for the council elections, in which they experienced the greatest single loss of their councillors in history. Even the damn meeting agenda was fake.

Still. Perhaps this explains the lack of umbrella or trousers.

9.09am

Nigel Farage confirms he will NOT stand at the general election. 

*pause for applause*

That’s because he’s helping Trump get re-elected in the US right now.

*pause for screams*

This is good news for the Tories!  And the rest of Britain, actually (commiserations to America. Please shoot him). Farage’s right-wing populist party - Reform UK - is the spiritual successor to UKIP and the Brexit Party, who’ve been splitting the right-wing vote for years.  Farage is popular; it’s bad news for Reform if he’s not part of their campaign, but simply fantastic news for those of us who think queer folks, women and people of colour deserve human rights.

9.19am

According to BBC News and others, Sunak has hired Isaac Levido, the election strategist behind the Tories’ landslide win in 2019.  Levido knows his stuff, and advised Sunak to stick with an autumn election.

Sunak ignored this advice.  Lol.

9.20am

In the Guardian, Sunak says there WON’T be planes of immigrants flying to Rwanda before the general election.  Good news for those of us who think it’s monstrous to deport immigrants to countries with unsafe governments.  Bad news for Tory voters who were hoping to get racists to vote for them.

Now, this is particularly funny, because promising to deport refugees to Rwanda in spite of overwhelming legal opposition on human rights grounds is probably the single hill that the Tories have chosen to commit genocide on. This bill has been in and out of every court in the land since they promised it in 2019. It's been on again off again more than a tawdry tabloid romance. But, they finally managed to push it through, and the first planes were set to fly in July.

This means! That Sunak's strongest cards going into the election were the drop in inflation, and the Rwanda bill. He could sell it as "In spite of those bleeding heart liberals, we persevered and managed to tenaciously get rid of these browns and thus fulfilled our promise", and the fact that it won't actually affect the immigration numbers wouldn't be clear until after the election. And make no mistake, it is VITAL that those planes fly before any election - quoth one influential Conservative MP on the right of the party to the BBC:

“I know what question you’re going to ask us again and again. "You’ll say we’ve been banging on about Rwanda for years and we’ve only managed to fly one migrant out there - and we paid him to go”.

It took a single day for that gamble to dramatically fail.

Lol. Lmao, even. One might almost say rofl.

9.21am

Sunak is emphasising his own role in managing the economy.

The Guardian’s Rowena Mason points out that it might be better to sell this as a Tory victory rather than a Sunak victory, considering how badly Sunak’s doing as an individual in the polls.

10.45am

I'm obviously giving a lot of attention here to the funniest and most ridiculous stuff, but let’s take a moment to celebrate some genuinely brilliant journalism:

0_o

The whole article’s worth reading. It confirms that at least one more hi-vis wearer was a Tory councillor in disguise (in this case Ben Hall-Evans). Perhaps this is why they started by removing all the real journalists.

12.42pm

Sunak’s campaign takes him to a brewery in Wales!  He attempts some Bonding With The Working Man and asks the workers if they’re excited for the football.

Top tip: if you don’t realise the country you’re in hasn’t qualified for the Euros, maybe don’t even mention the subject.

6.55pm

... here is a new problem. Ish.

As mentioned, three weeks ago, England held local council elections. In that time, the Tories lost over half their councillors; an unprecedented and staggering loss in one event. We are all still bathing in the schadenfreude.

But, many of those then left the party (probably fairly, actually - monsters though Tories are, that cannot have been fun.) But, the way politics in the UK works is that when you vote, you don't vote for the party - you vote for your local representative, and then it's a numbers game as to which party gets to rule. This means, with this sudden last-minute possibly-impulsively-declared-by-one-soggy-madman election now six weeks away, those candidates all need replacing so that the Tories will have a shot at getting the numbers they need to form a majority government.

Channel 4’s Paul McNamara reports that Conservative HQ have emailed asking for candidates in almost 100 seats.  The deadline’s tight for this – and apparently, joining the lengthening list of people who weren't informed of this stupid election plan, Tory associations are livid at being left so unprepared.

Now, a lot of these seats are Labour strongholds, so you don’t necessarily need more than a token Tory candidate for them. Phew! A great relief.

But some of them are actually good Tory seats. Uh oh!  Basildon, Bury St Edmunds, Wellingborough and Rushden …  It’s a bad hit to the Tories to have so little time to find good candidates for these seats.

8.59pm

Labour launch a campaign video.  It’s long, but the message is, “Remember life before the Tories got into power?  Wasn’t it BRILLIANT?”

And to prove how great 2009 was, they’ve included a clip of David Tennant’s Dr Who saying “I don’t want to go.”

Lol.

9.57pm

Filmmaker Richard Cubitt jokily suggests he could stand as a Tory candidate, and immediately defect to Labour as soon as possible once elected.

I don’t know if the deadline’s closed, but I am now speaking to the chat. Lads: the time will never be better. Do it. Tell the Tories you'll stand for them. Immediately defect. You have the opportunity to do the funniest thing. Be the rot in the barrel. The time is now.

ANYWAY. Oh boy. Day one of campaigning was quite bad. Ah well! Onwards and upwards for Wali Heb Broli. Let's see what Friday brings.

And of course: the losses are staggering (100 candidates!), but it could be worse.

At least it's not senior MPs.

Friday 24 May

7.00am

Over 70 MPs confirm they will not be standing for re-election.

7.35am

It’ll be lovely to see this election get rid of some truly awful Tories.  But no need to wait that long!  John Redwood stands down.  I haven't mentioned him before, but let's look at his clownface eggshell.

He opposed reducing the age of consent for homosexuality in 1994 and 1999, he voted to keep Section 28 in 2003, he opposed same sex marriage, he voted to reintroduce the death penalty in 1988, 1990 and 1994, he’s argued against Greta Thunberg over the UK’s climate emissions.

Although English, he became Secretary of State for Wales in 1993, and at a Tory conference, had to mime badly to the Welsh national anthem which he hadn’t bothered learning.  In 1995, he cheated Wales out of a £100 million grant by returning it unspent to the treasury, so it could go back to England.

So, John – if by some fantastically rare chance you’re somehow reading this – it’s wonderful to see you step down.  I wish you a very warm fuck you.  And I hope the rest of your life is absolutely horrible and filled with immeasurable pain. Kisses.

7.58am

Vicky Spratt of the i newspaper announces that, with an election announced, the Renters’ Reform won’t pass.

This is a big deal, actually - this was a rare good promise in the Tories’ 2019 manifesto to protect renters by ending no-fault evictions.  A good promise!  With cross-parliamentary support, only slowed as much as it was because most Tory backbenchers are landlords and so tried to block it. But the fighting raged on, and it was finally agreed.

And now it’s broken.  Wasting months of work by stakeholders, and thus forming another election promise that would have sailed through if only the election hadn't been called for July.

8.09am

Jeremy Corbyn – remember him? Former Labour leader, who was expelled from the Labour party in 2020 – confirms he’ll be standing as an independent.  He’s continued to be a member of Labour despite being an independent MP – but standing against Labour in an election means he’ll have his membership revoked too.

9.26am

So where are we at? How do you reckon the normal Tories in the party are faring? Do you think they're positive of a win? Do you think they expect to lose?

Great Guardian article here:

Highlights - one government minister happened to bump into his equivalent opposition member, and immediately thrust his official folder towards them, saying, “You might as well have this now.”

Another Tory MP hugged a Labour colleague and cast their arm around the room.  “Good luck.  This is all yours.”

One Tory backbencher was asked if it was a good idea to call an election.  “It’s a disaster. I can’t understand it.”

Even when they’re being optimistic, the Tories seem a little glum.  One long-standing MP said: “Of course I’m going to fight it, I don’t believe in just giving up like the prime minister has obviously decided to.”

A former minister raises an interesting point.  It’s not long, after all, since the Tories suffered those major defeats at the local council elections.  That's impacted the number of candidates, of course - but, local canvassing is largely done, on all parts of the political spectrum, but activist volunteers.

That loss was three weeks ago. If you were a volunteer who just spent weeks knocking on the doors of your neighbours and community, trying to convince them to vote for the dead horse, and then lost – maybe you won’t feel like hitting the streets again so soon. Maybe you'd prefer to be able to meet your neighbours' eyes when you bump into them in the bread slicing queue at Morrisons.

Some MPs have even admitted they won’t be cancelling holiday plans to fight the election.  On top of that, there's over 70 MPs that have already confirmed they’re quitting and won’t be seeking re-election!!! Absolute scenes.

Interestingly, some anti-Sunak Tories report frustration.  They reckon they were close to calling a vote of no-confidence, in the hopes of replacing Sunak with a different leader.  No idea if this is true – and if true, whether Sunak knew it. But given the panicked speed at which it seems to have been called...

11.08am

The campaign takes Rishi Sunak to the Titanic Quarter, to be interviewed by Belfast Live.

Elanor's Pro Tip: if you’re the leader of a failing political party, maybe don’t let journalists interview you on a site named after history’s most famous sinking ship.

11.57am

How’s the campaign going, Rishi?

Oh, Rishi. Looks like someone else is not meeting anyone's eyes in the bread-slicing queue.

1.12pm

Politics UK reports that 75 Tory MPs are now standing down at the election – the same number of Tories who stood down ahead of the 1997 election.

2.49pm

Sunak’s campaign takes him on board an aeroplane.

Elanor's Pro Tip: if you’re the leader of a failing political party, maybe don’t be photographed in front of an exit sign.

7.07pm

MICHAEL GOVE ANNOUNCES HE’S STANDING DOWN AS AN MP!

I could honestly use that gif like seventeen times in this write up. You can all thank me for my restraint in choosing just one.

The 79th Tory to do so at this election – an all-time record exodus.  Hey gang, would you like to see some familiar names joining him in this?

Theresa May

Sajid Javid

Dominic Raab

Matt Hancock

Ben Wallace

Nadhim Zahawi.

It’s just … not a great sign for the party, is it? That so many prominent MPs don’t reckon it’s worth sticking around.

7.50pm

Hey, remember those parody videos of Hitler getting angry with funny subtitles?  Someone made a good Sunak one:

10.48pm

The Guardian’s Kiran Stacey reports that Sunak will retreat from the campaign trail, spending the next day at home.

Honestly... that's probably best. Let him recover from the bread excitement.

10.50pm

We round off the day with Andrea Leadsom announcing she too is standing down as an MP. Bye, bitch.

WHAT A DAY! Still, Saturday will probably be better.

Saturday 25 May

12am

New episode of Doctor Who drops! It contains Welsh faeries. I later write a post explaining this. You're all welcome. Back to the circus.

10.06am

Good tweet alert!

11.14am

Keir Starmer promises to lower the voting age from 18 to 16 if he wins the election.

2.43pm

Hey remember how David Hameron was supposed to be in Albania? And actually went there? And then had to come back because of Rishi's totally-planned-for election announcement?

The Mirror reports that David Cameron spent £60,000 of taxpayers’ money getting to Albania for that trip.  He was there for 89 minutes, before he had to come back in light of the general election announcement.

This means it cost the country £674 a minute for Cameron to be in Albania for about as long as it takes to watch The Lion King.

6.14pm

Labour and the Tories put candidates forward for 650 seats in a general election.

Of course, that's not quite all of them. The Times’ Patrick Maguire understands that Labour have only 13 candidates left to select, which is pretty good.  The Tories are missing slightly more than that. 

They need to find around 190.

(The number is rising. Chat, you know what to do.)

9.29pm

According to the Telegraph, Theresa May has said if she was still PM she would have used an umbrella to declare the election.

She probably would have, too.

10.11pm

Now then!!! Gather round boys and girls and all the rest!

Remember: the election was called based upon the following main cards in Sunak's hand:

The Rwanda bill

Inflation falling

The Renter's Reform Bill

Inflation fell, but not by as much as it should have. The Rwanda plan fell through a day later. The election itself has blocked the Renter's Reform bill.

Rishi needs a new set of promises stat, in order to shore up votes from his most important bastions of support. What can he offer?

The evening brings the answer!

At 10.11pm - note the time - in spite of having taken the day off, Sunak promises mandatory national service for every 18 year old if he wins the election.  Either a year-long army placement, or a weekend a month volunteering for a year.

Sounds like a good pledge, if you’re hoping to motivate 18-year-olds to vote against you.

10.16pm

The Financial Times’ Jim Pickard reveals that the National Citizen Service (David Cameron’s legacy project) had its funding slashed by two-thirds in a 2022 review of government youth funding - when the chancellor was Rishi Sunak.

Five minutes.  That’s how long it took a journalist to melt Sunak’s new pledge.

Still; Tories never let facts get in the way.

10.27pm

Politics UK reports that leaked documents suggest teenagers would be jailed for refusing this national service.

11.47pm

Sunak's bad ideas generator works hard, but the meme makers of the internet work harder:

Still. Sunday is a day of rest! Hopefully Sunday will be better.

Sunday 26 May

9.50am

Let’s check the Sunday tweets.

Starting to think whoever is in charge of optics for Rishi Sunak may be a Labour plant.

10.21am

Fantastic tweet alert:

I Agree With Gabby

3pm

And then... PLOT TWIST!!!

FT’s Lucy Fisher reports that Sunak’s national service pledge - including assigning up to 30,000 18-year-olds to the military - was rejected this week by one of his own defence ministers.

Defence personnel minister Andrew Murrison warned of a hit to morale, headcount and resources if “potentially unwilling national service recruits” were introduced alongside Britain’s professional armed forces.

EVEN THE ARMY DON'T WANT THIS.

6.47pm

And then:

Incredible story from Gabriel Pogrund of the Times.

St Paul’s School, if you haven't heard of it, is an expensive and famous private school in England somewhere (I forget where and don't care).  As with other private schools, they’d be subject post-election to a Labour plan to remove their VAT exemption.

Tory MP Greg Hands took matters into his own Greg hands, and messaged the school’s parents’ WhatsApp group to try and drum up anti-Labour sentiment.

I can see the logic. These are parents with money, who have chosen to send their children to a private school that often means an easy track into politics generally and the Tory party specifically. I see why he thought he was safe.

Tumblrs, he was not safe.

Parents intervened, complaining about Hands spamming the chat, and claiming his use of the chat was “inappropriate”.

One parent messaged: “Can we stop assuming everyone is a Tory in this group.  A return to more morality, less corruption and more social conscience in British politics is not something to oppose necessarily.”

Another expressed that some parents will “feel it is hard to defend private schools being vat exempt.”

Ouch. Swing and a miss, Greg Hands.

Anyway. New week, new campaigning. I am writing this on Tuesday, and so our tale is nearly at an end for now; so let's see what happened on Monday.

Monday 27 May (Yesterday)

7.40am

Britain's teenagers respond to the national service plan. I love this tweet and the video it reposts:

And here, for your viewing pleasure, is the video:

8.17am

Tory MP Steve Baker (more on him later) actually tweets a public criticism of Sunak’s national service plan.  You might be thinking "Well yes, obviously"! But no! For you see, when approaching elections, parties need to be united. Divided parties generally find it harder to win elections.

Naughty Steve.

8.41am

Foreign Office Minister Anne-Marie Trevelyan, having seen the absolute shambles of Sunak’s campaigning, wakes up this fine Monday morn and invites him to hold her beer.

Appearing on Times Radio, she’s asked whether the parents of teenagers could be prosecuted if the teens refuse to take up national service.

And she doesn’t rule it out.

NO BUT WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ANNE-MARIE. IS THIS YOUR FIRST DAY OUT OF THE HOUSE.

Parents are NOT prosecuted for any wrongdoing of their ADULT CHILDREN.  How do you not understand this basic legal concept. The answer to that question was “no”!  You say “no” because it makes your party more likely to be elected, and you say “no” because the answer is no.

Oh dear. What a gaffe, as the papers say. Gosh, I really hope Anne-Marie Trevelyan’s gaffe stays contained.

8.56am

The Telegraph duly reports that parents of 18-year-olds might be fined if their children refuse national service.

Anne-Marie Trevelyan’s gaffe did not stay contained.

10.55am

Looks like the Tories are unhappy that the press revealed that Sunak took a day off from campaigning.

But that’s okay, they have a new strategy!  Reported by Politico, they’ve decided to suggest that Keir Starmer is too old to be a good Prime Minister.

They called him “weary” yesterday afternoon;

Tory Party Chair Richard Holden says it’s “bizarre” for Starmer to rest at home the day before a speech (but not for Rishi to - ? You know what, never mind);

A Tory aide tells the Sun that Starmer should be dubbed “Sir Sleepy” (what a Zinger, as those conscripted into national service say);

Another Tory aide calls Starmer “Sleepy Keir” according to the FT.

Keir Starmer is 61 years old.

11.17am

Let's check Tory candidate numbers!!!

Now last we looked it was 190, but obviously, as this is possibly their most urgent priority, they've been working flat out and recruiting across the land and so they have, fair play, managed to reduce that number.

The Spectator therefore reports that the Tories have 12 days to select 160 candidates.  Would you like to see the maths?

This means, on average, they need to select one candidate every 100 minutes.  Which is slightly less time than it takes to watch Toy Story 3.

#ChatYouKnowWhatToDo

12.41pm

The FT’s Lucy Fisher reports that Tory HQ has accidentally sent out an email criticising Tory MPs for failing to campaign, and warning of financial concerns in some seats.

Cannot stress this enough: even if the Tory campaign was going really well and they were predicting a landslide their way, this would be a terrible blow.

5.02pm

The Mirror reports that Tory MP Steve Baker is on holiday in Greece.  That’s pretty irresponsible, isn’t it?  What does Baker have to say for himself?

"The Prime Minister told everyone we could go on holiday and then called a snap election. So I've chosen to do my campaign work in Greece."

… this is the greatest Tory campaign in history.

(And once again... when exactly did you decide to do this, Rishi?)

5.15pm

In an absolutely baffling move whose motives I still cannot entirely fathom, Tory MP Lucy Allan - a repugnant, malignant liar of a woman who once altered an email from a constituent so she could claim it contained a death threat against her - is suspended by the party, for telling voters in her ward to vote for Reform UK instead of the Tories.

...

...

...

...wwwhyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

6.18pm

Good tweet alert! Here's political journalist Jonn Elledge:

6.30pm

Meanwhile, a Tory chooses to contact journalist Theo Usherwood over WhatsApp, criticising the election strategist Isaac Levido:

Now this is particularly interesting, because Levido is the guy who managed to swing the last GE to BlowJo, even though Labour were riding high on Corbyn. And I don't know, maybe he is actually shit at this and all that was luck.

I just... wouldn't have said he was the reason for this one going the way it is. Necessarily.

Finally, let's finish off Monday with a last good tweet:

10.06pm

***

That's all for now, folks! Thank you for reading, enjoy the circus playing out this week!

[rowdyluv]

𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 - 𝐥𝐡𝟒𝟑

summary: requested by @toasttt11 : “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone that makes me want to treat them like they’re royalty, like they do” in which luke yaps out about his girl to jack, luke hasn’t told his girl exactly how much he likes her, jack takes matters into his own hands.

warnings: use of y/n, couple uses of profanity, really it’s just luke being a massive s!mp for his girl so fluff fluff fluff, jack meddling (again)

word count: 2.25k

notes: thank you toast for this prompt request I had a lot of writing this!!! i didn’t think i would finish it so quickly but the tournament i was supposed to ref got cancelled so im stuck in a hotel with nothing to do but read and write… hopefully its good because i already wrote a 6 year in the future pt 2

As Luke slid the key into the lock, a warm, fuzzy feeling filled him up like a cup of his favorite grandma’s homemade hot chocolate after a long day of playing on the outdoor rink as a kid. He had just returned home from his date with a girl he had become absolutely smitten with. Her name was y/n, and she had this alluring way about her that made him feel as if he was walking on the clouds. It was in the way she laughed, how she would talk about her family, it reminded Luke of the way he talked about his family, it was the way she smiled when she talked about her favorite things. To Luke everything about her was perfect.

And now, here he was, back at his shared apartment with his middle older brother, grinning from ear to ear like an idiot. Jack, had spotted him as he was about to enter the apartment through the windows and was gingerly waiting to ask him what had him so smiley.

Luke routinely wears this tight lip, apprehensive smile but after being around her or simply just the thought of her was enough to bring out his genuine smile. “Who or what has you so giddy? You look like a child who was just told they were given unlimited access to a toy store for the next year.” Jack questioned. Scampering around their small living room to stay right on his younger brother’s heels. Attempting to insure he didn’t miss Luke’s answer. Luke didn't even need to think about it before he replied, "I’ve been seeing someone...and let’s say, if someone would have asked me what I wanted them to put together in a female, she is it. Wholly everything." He paused for a moment, letting the words sink in for Jack. Luke’s heart was still beating rapidly even after being away from y/n for half an hour now. He was truly down bad.

Jack's eyebrows raised, his mouth agape. Not believing what he just heard quite yet, "Wait, you mean you're in a relationship with someone?" He asked, trying to keep the incredulous tone out of his voice. Luke shook his head no, feeling a little self-conscious suddenly. Jack narrowed his eyebrows as if to question him why no, but didn’t just yet. Sometimes dating exclusively just doesn’t happen. "And this girl, she's...she's really special?" He prodded. Luke nodded again only a yes this time, and more confidently. "Yeah, Jack. Y/n is really special. I don't think I've ever met another girl that makes me want to treat her like she's royalty all the time, like she does." He paused, letting the words hang in the air. "I think...I think I might be falling in love with her." The silence that followed was deafening. Jack beginning to think Luke just might be serious.

Jack looked at Luke, attempting to gauge if he was serious or if he was just being his typical sarcastic self. But when he studied Luke’s eyes and noticed the sincerity shining through and the emotions held in each word he spoke that this definitely was not a joke. There was no way this was just another one of Luke's short flops either. He was serious about this girl.

For a short lived moment, Jack felt a pang of jealousy that the youngest was seemingly finding himself in a serious relationship. Only he quickly reminded himself that it wasn't like he was necessarily someone who had truly went out and tried to find himself someone special either. It also wasn't like Luke had ever been the kind to want anything that was deemed as just a good time or an easy lay. However, he also wasn’t one to talk about love, girlfriends, and all that over the top mushy stuff. Those topics were more of Quinn’s realm of interest. Jack had never thought he'd hear any of this from his younger brother. At least he didn’t expect it fresh out of his rookie year when women throw themselves at him.

Luke shifted uncomfortably, moving to sit on the couch next to Jack, emptying out his pockets onto the table, all while being under Jack's intense studying stare. "What?" He asked, not entirely sure how to react to his brother's silence. “So, you want to treat her like royalty?” Jack reiterated Luke’s previous comment. Luke nodded, feeling the heat in his cheeks intensify. Luke dropped his face into his hand for a few moments thinking how he’s going to approach his response before he spoke.

Jack took his chance and grabbed Luke’s phone. He knew his brother all toowell. He knew he would likely never be brave enough to spill out whatever confession he is about word vomit to him out again, let alone to y/n. He quickly shot off a text to her about it being from Jack, and that he was calling her but needed her to listen to the conversation, not talk to him unless he talks to her. Does Jack feel bad for tricking his baby brother and this girl? Oh definitely. But he thinks it will help him, he hopes it will at least. He’s grateful that Luke even mentioned her name.

“Yes I do want to treat her right. I don’t know her past relationships, and I’m not sure that they even matter? If it is her and I, I hope she never thinks of him or them again. I want to give her every reason to forget they ever even existed. I want to make her world be an entirely different place than it is now. Make it different. Better. Because she deserves it. So. Yeah Jack, yes, I want to be the guy who opens the door for her, who treats her like she's the most important person in the room, shit the most important person in this world. I want to make her feel special, you know?" He shrugged, looking up for the first time before meeting his brother's gaze. Thank goodness, Jack had the phone discreetly placed. Luke could continue his rambling which Jack knew by the way his eyes were glassed and his pupils dilated so large, “Go ahead, continue talking about her. You’ve stayed quiet about her for a while apparently, let’s hear it.” Jack wasn’t that interested or invested in Luke’s overtly smitten relationship but he was happy seeing his baby brother so happy.

Luke let out a small laugh, feeling the warmth spread from his chest to his fingertips. "Y/n is amazing, Jack. She's funny, and so damn smart, I am talking mom smart. I have never met anyone else as smart as mom until her, and...and the best part, get this she had no idea who I was before I introduced myself. I was just Luke to her, I wasn’t Luke Hughes, New Jersey Devil. I was just Luke again. I didn’t have to overcome some preconceived idea she already had of me. I only had to worry about the one she would form of me when we first met. She knows now that I play for the Devils, I wanted to be open about it but it was so nice to meet with out having to fight for showing someone that I am more than hockey. So for her, although it has only been a few true dates and a couple times seeing each other I want to show her that to me, she's as important as a princess." Luke paused, there was a faraway look in his eyes, as if he was imagining the moments of treating her, loving her. "She hates being paid for, but I want to give her everything she desires, needs, I don’t want to do it because I’m fortunate enough to be able to. I want to because she never puts herself first. If she’ll be with me, one day she’ll be the first in my universe.” Luke turned his to look at his older brother, hoping that he was getting through to him. He sure was. Jack was nothing short of wonderstruck.

"She's a lucky girl, you know that? To have someone like you who genuinely cares for her, who sees beyond the superficial layers and goes deep, who wants to make her feel so special." Luke nodded, a small smile playing at the corner of his lips. "No. You’re wrong. I am the lucky one. I just hope she knows how I feel. I don't want to mess this up." Jack reached over and pulled Luke into him by the shoulder, a normal gesture of affection from the older brother. "Just be you, little bro. That's all you can do, seems it already worked for you. Right? Mr. Just Luke. Question is though, have you even began to tell her any of this?” Jack asked him possibly the most important question of the entire conversation.

Luke paused for a moment, his expression turning down from the previous glowing high. "Not yet. Us Hughes boys do have a track record of doing or saying dumb shit too early. I don't want to put any pressure on her to reciprocate the same feelings. I just want her to know that she makes me happy, that she's special to me. But I want her to feel it, see it in my actions, without having to say it." He sighed, resting his head back against the couch. "But I know I should tell her, right?”

Jack flashed him a smile, retracting his his arm from over his shoulders and dropping it over to pat Luke's knee. "Yeah, you should. But you've got this, little bro. You've got a good head on your shoulders, and you're being genuine. She'll see it. And if you're still worried about it, well, I'll always be here to help you. Like now.” Jack revealed that he had stolen Luke’s phone off the coffee table when he had dropped his head earlier in the conversation. Y/n listened silently hearing his verbose words he shared over their time together. Her heart palpitated a few times over things he had said specifically about her. No one had ever talked about her the way Luke did. It made her feel ways she was unsure how to put into words just yet.

A few moments of shared unutterable silence spread across the three of them when Jack had announced that y/n was on the phone and she inevitably had heard Luke’s emotional admiration for her, y/n’s voice finally broke through the speaker of the phone.

"Luke, I'm so glad you told him that. Or well both of us that.. It's just... well, you know... I am just me, a normal person. There’s no need to overplay it silly boy." Her voice was soft, almost shy like it was the night Luke and her me. Probably because Jack was listening, but there was still the hint of that playfulness that Luke had started to love. "I can't even tell you how much it means to me that you see past all of my quirky interests and...” She paused for just a split second “Can I come off speaker phone? Uhm.. I really just want Luke to hear this.” Jack handed Luke his phone with a smug I told you so look plastered on his face. “Hey, it’s just you and I now.” Luke told her, even getting up off couch to allow space between him and his nosey brother. Luke had a smile so big spread across his face. Jack couldn’t help but smile too. His baby brother was growing up on him. Y/n continued, “and most of all I like that you're just Luke for me, and that you felt comfortable enough to still tell me so quickly about your life when you could’ve kept me in the dark for however long you wanted to. You may be this hockey star, but for me you’re just Luke. I mean, I know you're amazing at hockey and all, but that doesn’t define who you are in life. You are so much more. You're funny and sweet and thoughtful, and I just... I just can't help but feel lucky that I get to spend time with you. And I hope you know that." She paused, her voice catching a little, and Luke could swear he could hear her sniffling. "So, um, yeah. I guess what I'm trying to say is... I want you to know that I feel the same way.” Luke’s face kept flushing deeper shades of red it was nearly burgundy by the time y/n was finished talking. He couldn’t form a coherent sentence without stammering entirely over his words. He pulled his phone away from his ear and opened their text thread.

“Can I come to your place? I think we should finish talking in person?”

Luke pressed send and heard her cute giggle through the phone speaker. “Yes. I’ll see you soon.” The two shared their goodbyes before hanging up the phone. “Jack. You’re dead when I get back, but thank you.” Luke said to his brother scurrying around the living room for his shirt he discarded earlier and his sneakers.

Luke grabs his keys and wallet from the bowl in the table by the door. Murmuring a goodbye to Jack and essentially leaps out the door. He has a very little talking he wants to complete and a lot of affection to start giving. Y/N is anticipating his arrival because first thing she plans on doing is nabbing a kiss from the sweetest boy on this planet. Both of them riddled with anticipation to see each other. If they turn out not to be meant for each other, then there is no way soulmates exist. Luke and y/n are two halves apart that become one when close to one another.

[sinofwriting]

Homecoming - Oscar Piastri/Reader/Logan Sargeant

Words: 3,290 Summary: She hasn’t seen them since April and she can only hope that they aren’t mad that she lied to them. Note(s): Thank you @casperlikej for this commission! Had a lot of fun writing it! NSFW. Takes place in 2023. Reader is in the military. Reader is an American, who also somewhat grew up in the UK, but it’s all very vague. Also, don’t surprise people in showers, injuries can and will happen. Read Part Two Here

Masterlist | Support Me! | Part of Sin's 5k & B-Day Celebration

“I’m sorry.” She apologizes.

“It’s okay, baby.” Logan says.

Oscar nods, but there’s worry in his eyes. “Is everything okay?”

She nods, “yeah, they just gave me the wrong date. It wasn’t until I was talking to my CO about leaving that they realized. I should’ve said something sooner.”

“It happens.” Oscar tells her and she can see through the computer screen the way his fingers twitch, obviously wanting to reach out, and her heart aches.

She misses them so much, both her boys. Hasn’t seen them since April when China got canceled and they both managed to get away from their teams to see her. But she hasn’t really seen them since last year, since 2022, when Oscar was just a reserve and Logan was in F2 with their weird spotty schedule. They didn’t have as many race dates or things to attend. They had spent so much time with her then.

“Do they have your next date for leave?”

She shakes her head. “Not yet. I think they’re trying to figure out how they gave me the wrong date.” She shrugs. “But it could mean I get some extra time.”

Oscar snorts but Logan nods.

“You’ll let us know as soon as you can?”

“Of course, Lo. As soon as they tell me, I’ll text you. Have a good day, though, both of you.” Both their noses wrinkle but they nod.

And with I love you’s exchanged, she hangs up, looking at the packed suitcase next to her. Hopefully they wouldn’t be too mad that she lied.

—

Being in the military wasn’t exactly something she planned on. Not as a little girl, not as a preteen and not at fifteen when she discovered she liked both her best friends.

But then she was seventeen wanting to apply to different colleges and programs and her parents had to sit down and tell her that while they had this nice house and the family home in Florida and cars and she hadn’t really wanted for anything, that was all they had. They didn’t have enough money for her to apply to three colleges, let alone the near twenty she wanted to.

It had been a fight instantly. Because she didn’t know what she wanted to do. And for the past year they had been telling her that it was okay and that she’d have college to figure that out and it had been a lie. She remembers throwing things in a bag and going to Oscar’s brand-new place, because he was already eighteen and his parents wanted him to be comfortable.

She remembers throwing herself in his arms and then Logan’s because of course Logan was also there. Remembers crying because it kind of felt like her world was ending. She remembers the way they both had soothed her, held her, let her rage and sob. She remembers the way after when she was more calmed down, the shock gone from her system, they presented a bunch of options for her.

Working with them, working for Oscar’s dad, working for Logan’s uncle, doing this in college and that, just something, anything that sounded appealing and she can remember how she shook her head after every option and how despite that they didn’t get frustrated or angry, they just said okay before offering another until they ran out of things to offer.

It was her uncle, though he wasn’t really her uncle, that told her she should think about the military. She laughed at first thinking he was joking, but he hadn’t laughed with her, instead looked at her seriously.

“You know that I served.” And she had nodded, she had faint memories of being in elementary school or even younger back in Florida and seeing him in uniform, medals and ribbons on his chest. “And you know I’ve said a lot about it. Never kept quiet.”

“Rock and a hard place.”

He smiled for a second at her words before looking all serious again. “Exactly. What I’m saying is, it’s an option. And nowadays, your contracts aren’t as long depending on the branch like when I enlisted and I’ve got friends.”

“I don’t think I’ll like it.”

He laughed at her words. “No one knows if they’ll like it until they are in it. Just think about it. It’s something and it will give you time, paid time, to figure out what you really want to do.”

And she had thought about it. She thought about the pros and the cons, how the cons outweigh the pros for her and she nearly didn’t go through with it because of Logan and Oscar. Because they just had to confess to her, tell her that they liked her, wanted to be with her and how could she not tell them the same when it was true? She couldn’t. She had nearly called it good, happy to bounce between them playing personal assistant or social media admin or something, they didn’t really know what she’d do going back and forth, but then she saw her uncle again, a week before she turned eighteen.

He hadn’t said anything, hadn’t brought it up, hadn’t even mentioned the military. But just seeing him reminded her of their conversation, of the way she spent hours upon hours after considering it.

Seeing him made her realize she had to go through with it.

She doesn’t really remember telling Logan and Oscar her decision. She remembers how they reacted, both surprised, unaware she had been considering it. Logan had been understanding, but he was from America just like her, he had family in the service. Oscar didn’t understand, couldn’t understand why. It hadn’t been a fight, not that she remembered, but she knew that her decision had nearly broken them that day.

—

“You reenlisting?” Her uncle’s voice is gruff.

“No, sir.”

He grumbles, lips twitching into a smile. “Good. And don’t call me sir. You in reserves now?”

She nods. “As of last week.”

“Logan and Oscar know?”

She throws him a look. “Why would you be driving me to Vegas if they knew?”

He laughs. “Fair. They’re doing good, right? In their Formula One thing?”

She smiles, “Yeah, they’re doing alright. Did you like COTA?”

He shrugs, merging onto the freeway. “Didn’t understand it, but it was alright. Beer was overpriced.” “Always is at events.”

“I remember when you could get a six-pack,” he starts and she mouths along with him, having heard this since she was ten, unable to not smile as she does so. “What?” He asks, seeing her smile.

“Nothing.” She tells him. “Just happy to see you haven’t changed.”

—

Vegas is annoying, she decides as she waves her uncle off, the older man having decided to stick around and try his luck at one of the casinos. Or rather the traffic currently in Vegas is annoying.

Pulling out her phone she texts Benny letting him know that she’s at the hotel. Looking around she smiles at all the lights and people milling around. She’d give Vegas this, it was pretty cool to look at.

“Y/N!” She turns her head, smiling at Logan’s trainer. “You got here early!” He chuckles, pulling her into a hug that she returns with one arm, still having a hand on her suitcase.

“We made good time. Switched off driving, so saved us a bit from having to stop really.”

He pats her on the back before letting her go. “But it was good.”

She nods. “All good. How are you? How are the kids?”

He grins. “They’re good, amazing, really. Excited that the season is ending and I’ll be home.”

“Logan was telling me that you aren’t going to be his trainer next season.”

Benny sighs, looking sad as they step foot into the hotel. “The kids are getting older, I want to be there more. If there was a way I could stay on, but not have to go to all the races I would. I love the kid, he’s like one of mine.”

She looks at him considering. She’d been around Logan and Oscar for ten years now, had been around their trainers for over five years, seeing what they did had made it easy for her to choose her degree that the military paid for while she served a year after she joined.

“Maybe you could.”

His eyebrow raises.

“I have a degree in sports medicine.”

“But you have a year left.”

She shakes her head. “That last year is reserves, unless we are going to war and all the active reserves have been called, I’m not going back in.”

“Logan didn’t say.”

“They don’t know.”

Benny makes a weird huff sound, shaking his head. “You’re going to knock them off their feet this weekend.”

She laughs. “Maybe. Just talk to Sarah about it first, I’ll follow you around this weekend and next and we can talk about it with Logan.”

“I don’t have to talk about it with Sarah, she’d be thrilled, she wasn’t fond of the idea in the first place. And Logan…” He shakes his head. “If you think Logan won’t be jumping at the idea of having you around twenty-four seven, you’ve lost it.”

“Still! Talk about it with Sarah first, just in case.”

He shakes his head, but agrees, handing her a key card as they stop in front of a hotel room door. “This is their room. Gentle with them.”

“Kim ask you to relay that message as well?”

“Yes.”

She laughs, nodding. “I will. Promise.”

He rolls his eyes, but there’s a grin on his face. “Go. I’ll see at least two of you tomorrow.”

“Bye Benny. Thank you again for helping me.”

“Of course.”

She watches as he walks down the hallway before taking out his own key card and entering his hotel room, just a few rooms down. Turning back to face the hotel room door, excitement starts to fill her. She was finally going to see them, be with them.

Pressing the key to the reader, she holds her breath as she waits for the door to unlock, breathes again when it does and she twists the door knob, letting herself in.

The door swings open quietly and her feet and suitcase make no noise against the carpet as she steps inside. There’s the faint sound of the shower running and music playing, and a large smile spreads across her lips. This was the routine she was used to, that hadn’t changed. Them coming back to their hotel room or when finally checking in, getting what they needed put away if they were staying long enough and then putting on some music and hopping in the shower.

The door closes with a small click as she shuts it, kicking off her shoes next to Oscar’s and Logan’s as she does. She hopes as she puts her suitcase next to Logan’s, that the shower is big enough for the three of them, but they’ve made do with some fairly small showers before.

Stepping further into the hotel room, she nearly giggles at the song playing, able to hear it clearly now with the way the bathroom door isn’t completely closed. She loves them so much.

Spotting the dirty clothes bag she bought Oscar for Christmas last year as a stock stuffer, right by the bathroom door, propped against the wall and already filled with a pair of jeans, shorts, shirts and socks, she adds her own pants, shirt, underwear and socks. A quiet sigh leaving her when she takes her bra off, which she carefully places on the back of an armchair.

The bathroom tiles are warm underneath her feet and she lets out a little oh, having expected them to be cold.

Her eyes dart to the sink where the large mirror behind is covered in steam, but her eyes quickly leave it to settle on the shower.

It’s big, maybe just big enough for the three to fit in, but she can’t focus on that because Oscar and Logan are there. She can’t see much, the glass of the shower just as covered in steam as the mirror, but she can see the shapes of their bodies, close together, holding each other as the water hits them.

Taking a deep breath, she steps towards the shower door. She shivers as her fingertips press against the glass before fingers move to open it and poking her head in, voice soft as she looks at them. “Room for one more?”

She watches as they separate, Oscar turning to look at her, and they both look at her with confusion and shock, before wide smiles take over their entire faces, eyes shining with happiness.

Oscar the closer of the two reaches forward and she quickly steps in, nearly slipping in her hurry, but Oscar has an arm around her before she can, tucking her into his chest, as Logan shuffles around. The door to the shower closes with a slight noise before his arms are around her as well.

Tension immediately leaves her body at the feeling of them both, and tears start to slip from her eyes. “I missed you guys so much.”

“We missed you too, baby.”

“So much.” Oscar echoes, arms tightening around her before loosening and she’s being pulled away slightly. She wants to protest, but then his lips are on hers and she moans, sinking into his kiss.

“Lo,” she whines when Oscar stops kissing her, lips tingling.

Oscar chuckles, the sound rich and so familiar it wants to make her cry again, but she’s being turned around and Logan is kissing her, his palms cupping her cheeks.

“I missed this so much.” Logan breathes against her lips. “Missed the three of us so much.”

“Never again.” She tells him, tells Oscar, tells them. “Never again. I don’t have to go back, I’m in inactive reserves and I’m not reenlisting. I’m yours, both of yours.” The words come out in a rush, nearly tripping over each other, but she can’t wait, can’t have them thinking that this will just be a short reunion before she has to leave them again.

“Thank god.” Logan breathes before pressing their lips together. “Thank god.” He murmurs again when they separate before she’s turned around to face Oscar again, who practically swallows her whole.

His lips are insistent on hers as his hands clutch at her hips, fingers digging painfully and she hopes that he leaves bruises, wishes that he’d make his grip even tighter, knows he can. She tries to pull away, to ask him to, but he keeps following her lips. Like if he isn’t kissing her, she’ll disappear, so she stops trying. Lets him kiss her, moans when Logan’s lips land on her shoulder, pressing kisses that trail up to the top of it and along the shell of her ear before trailing back down.

“We,” she gasps when Oscar finally stops kissing her, though his lips instead fall to her breasts going between the two, unable to decide which one he wants to give attention to more. “We can’t do this in here.”

The next moments are a blur as they scramble out of the shower, out of the bathroom and tumble into bed, soaking the duvet, pillows, and sheets with their wet naked bodies. It’s a blur of lips on hers, on her body, of fingers pressing and pulling. She remembers clearly the first press of fingers into her body, of Oscar’s tongue laving at her, of the kiss Logan and Oscar shared between her thighs. It blurs with her first and second orgasm.

She remembers clearly as well, the first sink of Oscar’s cock into her, her back to his chest as he laid down, the way he pressed all the way into her, not letting her adjust. She doesn’t remember the apparent fumble for lube or the first two fingers that Logan had carefully sunk into her alongside Oscar’s cock. She remembers the stretch of his three fingers and Oscar’s cock, and finally the stretch of him sinking into her as well. The near painful stretch of having both of them inside her at the same time, in the same hole.

Her mind is still blurry, still coming down from pleasure when they finally break the silence of just trying to catch their breaths and music still playing from the bathroom.

“That was so good.”

She makes a small noise in agreement.

“You felt so good.” Oscar says, kissing her shoulder and she shudders at the feeling. “You both did.” And she can hear the sound of Oscar kissing Logan.

“Logan’s gonna hold you now, okay.” Oscar tells her as she still lays somewhat on top of him. “Both of your legs are shaking.” That makes her blink and look down, swallowing hard because she hadn’t even realized hers were shaking. “And I need to clean you up and get some water for all us, okay?”

She nods.

Despite him telling her that, she still nearly whines when he moves out from under her, but he quickly pushes her into Logan’s arms who eagerly holds her close. She hadn’t seen if his legs were shaking as well like Oscar said, but she doubts it with the way Logan manages to turn her around in his arms and pull her so she’s on top of him, her breasts pressed against his chest just the way he likes.

“Love you so much, baby.” Logan murmurs into her hair. “You were so good for us. Just fell apart over and over again. Gave us five orgasms.”

She makes a surprised sound. That didn’t sound right.

“A whole five, baby. It was fucking amazing.”

She nuzzles into his neck and he continues speaking, knowing the sound and feeling is soothing.

He stops when Oscar comes back, making a tutting noise at how they are positioned which makes her mumble Logan’s name and Oscar runs a hand down her calf.

“I know, darling. You’re alright. You though,” and she can picture the way Oscar is looking at Logan, pointing a finger at him. “How am I supposed to clean you up?”

She feels Logan shrugs as best as he can with her on top of him. “The way you usually do.”

The younger makes a huffing sound but is quiet. She can feel his breath against her leg as he most likely bends.

Logan makes a small noise and she kisses his neck. “Cold?”

“No, it’s warm.” He reassures her.

She hums and when it’s her turn she doesn’t even jolt at the feeling of the washcloth running over her most sensitive parts and her thighs.

“Alright, you two, you both got to sit up to drink some water.” Oscar says, as he climbs back into bed with them.

Logan grumbles and she turns her head to watch as Oscar gets comfy with his back against the headboard, three water bottles on his nightstand.

He’s still naked, probably not even thinking of pulling on underwear or sweats on and it makes her want to curl up in his lap. He seems to feel her eyes on him because he smiles, all soft, sweet, fond and he’s opening his arms and she carefully moves off Logan to do what she thought about it.

Her head rests on his shoulder, as she sits sideways on his lap, facing Logan, who watches them both with that awestruck look of his as he sits up and scoots closer until him and Oscar are sitting side by side and he can draw her feet into his lap, stilling letting her stay curled up in Oscar’s lap, but getting some contact with her.

“Love you both.”

“We love you too.”

@darleneslane @copper-boom @eutrizbea @kimmib13 @elliegrey2803 @stopeatread @hiireadstuff @tallrock35

[heliads]

Can I pretty please request Carlos Sainz x reader where she’s rly shy and gets worried that maybe he wants someone more outgoing but he tells her he loves her any way she is? Your writing is amazing 🫶🏻

anon i love you wholeheartedly please let me speak on carlos

masterlist

You are not who you are supposed to be. There are qualifications for being the girlfriend of a Formula One driver, you’re sure of it, probably even a style guide somewhere if you only bothered to look it up. Perfect hair. Clean makeup. Pretty, but doesn’t try too hard. Willing to give up their whole life to follow one man on mad jaunts across the planet. Wherever your guidebook is, though, you must have lost it long ago, because you have absolutely no idea what you’re doing, and worst of all, it’s starting to show.

You never should have gotten into this position in the first place. That isn’t to say that you hate it, far from it; dating Carlos Sainz is the best thing that ever happened to you, making you the happiest wrong person at the right time to ever exist. In every other universe, he’s probably seeing models or actresses, but here, he has you, and you’re willing to fight off every multiversal version of you just to keep everything as it is right now.

Your butterfly effect was quite stunning, actually. You ended up getting tickets to a Grand Prix through last minute cancellations. They were great, came with paddock passes and all that, and while you were lingering through Ferrari hospitality, Carlos happened to drop by to visit a friend and he noticed you while you were in line to get some water. He’s got the confidence of, well, a world class athlete, an adrenaline junkie, a professional race car driver, and so he introduced himself.

Sometimes, it’s just as easy as that. A father’s cousin’s roommate buys two tickets to a Grand Prix, then a stranger’s roommate’s brother gets sick, and suddenly you’re touching down off a plane overseas and walking through the door of paddock hospitality. You wear red, and you are seen. Just like that.

It took one more weekend before either of you knew that you wanted what you had to last for good. He texted you, followed you on Instagram and blew his cover of seeming cool by accidentally liking a post of yours from six years ago. And, when he saw you again, he knew that he wanted the spark between you to be something more, something like a bonfire.

Coincidence may have supported you thus far, but you don’t trust it not to abandon you. At the end of the day, you are you, you are Y/N L/N, and you are so far removed from Carlos’ world that it stuns you to think that you were even in his orbit so long as to meet him. If there are powers that be somewhere in the universe, they’re either playing a cruel joke or messing around to give you a helping hand. 

Hopefully, it’ll be the latter, but truly who knows at this point. As if it wasn’t surreal enough to introduce Carlos to your friends and family as Carlos Sainz, Formula One driver. As if it doesn’t blow your minds that people have started making Instagram accounts just dedicated to posting photos of you and your boyfriend whenever you’re seen out together.

The problem lies in the insanity of it all. You are not from this sort of life, you weren’t born into a silver spoon dynasty and you barely know how to interact with any of them now. You get along with the other WAGs as best you can; Heidi’s lovely, sure, and you were friendly with Charlotte until she disappeared, but sometimes it feels like it’s just you and your boyfriend against the world. Of any ally to pick, Carlos would be your top choice each and every time, but still. The fact remains that he will go out and race and leave you to your own devices, and you lack the extroverted impulses to social climb with everyone else.

This, then, is the main concern. You can pick out whatever designer clothes you want, goodness knows Carlos has offered to buy you anything already, and you can get your nails and hair done before each and every race, but that doesn’t change the fact that you, at your core, are never going to enjoy the paparazzi circus whenever you have to brave it.

It’s just not your scene, that’s all. You’re on the quieter side, happy to spend time with a few key friends but increasingly nervous in large crowds. Formula One is all large crowds, as you’ve discovered; thousands of fans, hundreds of engineers and team members, plus drivers and girlfriends and best friends. So many eyes, all on you. So many voices all shouting over each other.

You love Carlos, though, and you love him wholeheartedly, so you gather up your courage and go to race weekends when you can. Every time Carlos sees you in the crowd, he smiles so widely his friends tease him for weeks, and he runs to you first after every podium and strong finish. You want to be there for your boyfriend, truly you do, you just wonder if all of this should come easier to you than it does.

Also, you wonder if Carlos wishes the same thing. He has been nothing but perfect to you, so the spirals of guilt currently tangling their way through your insides are purely of your own creation, but what if he truly does think like that? Carlos must see the other WAGs, how they shine and sparkle with attention instead of feeling the urge to run. Wouldn’t he want that? Wouldn’t he get frustrated that you can’t be like the rest?

Thousands of girls in the world, and he picks you. You don’t know if it’s sweet or genuinely frightening. He wanted you out of everyone, yes, but he could replace you in a snap, swapping you out like some useless part on his car. There is nothing about you that cannot be replicated in any other girl. Even Charles did it, in a way, got himself a new girlfriend that’s a dead ringer for Charlotte. Carlos has no reason to keep you except for something he knows and you don’t.

The guessing will drive you mad, maybe, but you’ll lose your sanity long before that just trying to keep up with everything in his fast-paced life. You’ve been to prior F1 races, obviously, it’s how you met Carlos in the first place and it’s also how you kept him, but this upcoming weekend is different, this is Barcelona. Carlos is the center of attention at his home race, and every step he takes, a new storm of people is flooding in to ask him for autographs, selfies, anything to remind them that he’s real and right before their eyes.

Carlos doesn’t ask for a whole lot, and he certainly didn’t force you to come to this race, but you saw the hope in his dark eyes when he brought it up oh-so-casually at a dinner last week. You had assured him that you would go there to cheer him on along with the rest of his home crowd, and Carlos had been delighted for the rest of the evening.

You are happy to go, truly, but it’s taking everything in you to keep your smile up in front of the reporters and crowds and fans, and it’s just the first day. All you’re handling right now is qualifying, not even the actual race. In the back of your mind, a voice whispers that it’s only going to get worse from here on out, but when Carlos looks back at you as you wind through the paddock, you just smile and tell him you’re glad to be there with him. You’re here for him, after all, and Carlos is busy enough with race stuff that he won’t want to hear your complaints.

That’s what you keep repeating to yourself throughout the entirety of that day. Carlos qualifies well and is properly pleased about it, as he should be. The possibility of a podium or perhaps even a win for his home race has been one of his top goals for the season, and he’s as close as he can get to it right now. He earnestly talks about it the whole drive back to your hotel, but once you’re back in the safety and peace of the room, the conversation abruptly switches back to you.

Carlos sheds his jacket at the door, watches you flop down onto the bed with a smile on his face, then asks you pointedly, “And how are you doing, amor?”

You smile back at him, the expression trained to perfection after being tested so many times today. “Great! Glad that everything’s going so well for you. I’ll be cheering for P1 tomorrow.”

In truth, you’re tired more than anything. People kept coming up to you all day, assuming that taking a selfie with Carlos’ girlfriend was at least half as good as getting to see him. They gave you all manner of gifts and things to give to him, extracting promises that you’d tell him dozens of different people wished him well. You knew you’d get a lot more attention when you started dating Carlos, but the lack of personal space and privacy at the races is truly unlike anything you’d experienced before.

Carlos has been dating you long enough to pick up on this, apparently, because he furrows his brow and sits down on the edge of the bed next to you. “I’ll be glad to see you tomorrow, but do you want to tell me what is really on your mind? Don’t try to tell me otherwise. I know you, no?”

You sigh, covering your face with one of your arms. Carlos deflects from this attempt to hide by gently pulling your arm away, pressing a kiss to your forehead to make up for it. “Talk to me, cariño.”

You look sorrowfully at him, but when it becomes clear that Carlos won’t let you go until you confess, you give in. “It’s just a lot, I guess. The people and the cameras and everything.”

Carlos frowns. “I can get them to go away, you know that. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

You look away. “I just thought you wouldn’t want to hear it. All of the other girlfriends have no problem with it, just me. I thought you’d want me to be more outgoing, so I tried, I really did, it’s just hard for me, I don’t know why.”

When you dare to risk a glance up at Carlos, you’re surprised to notice that he looks genuinely hurt. “Sweetheart, you didn’t think that I would actually be unhappy about that? I just want you to be happy. Don’t think about me.”

You let out a low breath. “I know, it’s just– I want to be like the rest, really. I don’t want this to be a reason–”

You cut yourself off, distracted by Carlos’ hands still wrapped around yours. Carlos picks up on the obviously dropped subject, though, and looks at you with fresh concern. “You don’t want it to be a reason for what?”

“That you would break up with me,” you whisper.

That’s it, then. That’s the truth. If you can’t live with Carlos’ lifestyle, why wouldn’t he leave you for someone who could? It makes perfect sense to you, but judging by Carlos’ expression, that logic couldn’t be further from his mind.

“No, Y/N,” he says, “That’s not right at all. I don’t want to break up with you, like, ever. Not because of this. I don’t want someone else, I want you. I love you, querida. I love the girl who showed up out of nowhere and made me forget about every other woman in the world. I love the girl who shows up to my home race even though it stresses her out because she wants to be there for me. I love you, Y/N. No one else. Just you.”

And, well, in the face of such passionate declarations, who could stand firm in their own self-pity? Certainly not you. You smile and let him kiss you again and again until you can’t see straight, and after that it is better, it is all better. Hearing it straight from Carlos is better than trying to guess at it. It lets your worries finally sink off into nothingness. It’s just you and him, just what he wants. Just what you want.

f1 tag list: @j-brielmalfoy

[kissingghouls]

Movie Night

Copia x gn!Reader

Summary: The movie (no spoilers here) made me feel are warm and fuzzy so I wrote some comfort Copia. 1k words.

tags: gross domestic fluff. established relationship.

Copia’s suite was bathed in a warm glow, courtesy of the large vintage (his words) television he was adamant about using for occasions like this. The wood-paneled vacuum tube TV weighed a ton, but he insisted on propping the thing up in front of his perfectly functional flatscreen to watch his “special movies.” 

You’d scoffed at the first invite of course, wondering why in the hell Papa Emeritus was seemingly asking you to stop by and watch porn with him when you barely knew each other. He quickly and nervously explained that he simply meant they were his favorite films—a collection of old VHS copies he had carted around for his entire career. Each one was more or less in pristine condition, minus some fading or wear and tear on the old paper sleeves. He treasured these movies, keeping them locked away from ghouls or unruly older brothers for years.

But he wanted to show them to you.

Your adoration for him grew with each showing, the way he would tell stories about why whatever movie meant something to him. Sometimes it was an emotional attachment tied to a pivotal moment in Copia’s life. Other times it was just because he thought the movie was so cool. One movie at a time, your chosen spots on his sofa drifted closer and closer until the night he finally asked permission to kiss you. You gave it happily, filled with the flutter of butterflies over this sweet man.

Now his rooms were beginning to feel more like a second home, a place he wanted to share with you as much as those old videotapes. You were so comfortable with him here, happy to doze off and wake next to him on that overstuffed sectional. There was more than enough room for the two of you, but Copia liked that you’d cuddle up to him or use his thighs as a pillow after a long day. You never wanted to cancel movie night with him.

The notes of Copia’s cologne mixed with the scent of butter from the bowl of popcorn he always made for these dates. There was a touch of sugar in the air, the chocolate and peanut butter candies slowly melting in the popcorn bowl. Copia absently grabbed another handful and made a tiny happy sound as he chewed the salty and sweet snack.

You pulled your blanket a little higher, wrapping it around your shoulders before shifting in your seat. A little sigh left your lips as you settled your head in his lap for the millionth time. He lazily threaded a hand through your hair, while the other traced the familiar buttons on the remote. The movie paused and actors stilled mid-conversation, a discussion you’d stopped following some time ago.

“Dolcezza? Is everything okie dokie?” he asked softly.

“Mmhmm,” you hummed in response. “Just getting comfortable.”

He chuckled—a gentle heh heh heh that you were falling in love with—before he began to speak again. “We’re gonna need a bigger couch.”

“Hmm?”

“Ah, just a little movie joke, dolcezza. Never mind me.”

“I like your jokes,” you replied sleepily. 

“Really?” 

The surprise in his voice hurt a bit. You hoped after this many movie dates he would have realized how much you enjoyed everything about him. But insecurity and doubt occasionally liked to chew at the man’s insides. No amount of face paint or bejeweled robes could hide those moments from you.

You pushed yourself back up so you could look him in the eye. “Copia.”

He gave you a sheepish smile. “Forgive me, dolcezza. I didn’t think anyone liked my jokes.”

“Well, I do. So there.”

He smiled again, brighter this time.  He draped an arm over your shoulders and pulled you a little closer. “What has two thumbs and really likes you?”

You furrowed your brow, deep in thought. Pointing at the tv you asked, “the shark?”

He shook his head, that delightful laugh returning. “That guy has no thumbs.”

“Ah well,” you conceded. “Is it…the guy on the boat?”

“Now you’re breaking my ass, dolcezza.”

“Pretty sure you mean busting your balls.”

He winced and covered his crotch. “Not without a safe word.”

You tried to fight it, chewing your lip to keep from laughing, but he raised an eyebrow and wiggled in his seat to draw it out of you. An uncontrollable giggle bubbled up and forced you to hide your face against his shoulder to try to stop. His hand trailed down from your shoulder, squeezing your side before tucking you even closer under his arm.

“You know, dolcezza,” he began nervously. “I love your laugh.”

Your heart raced. It was a word neither of you had used in relation to each other, instead carefully places likes had peppered your conversations over the last few weeks. But you’d felt it for a while, slowly but surely you were falling. And not just for Papa as so many others did, but the man underneath it all. The man with the silly jokes and cheesy dance moves. The man with the special tv for his special movies who groaned every time he sat down. The man who’d acted like you were worthy of a Nobel Prize for introducing him to putting candies in his popcorn.

That was it. You loved Copia.

“Love?” you asked, searching his mismatched eyes for any hint as to what he might say next.

“Sì, love,” he confirmed easily and tapped you on the nose. “I love your laugh.”

You grinned back at him, happy to be at his side like this. “Well, I love your jokes.”

He brought his hand to your chin, tilting your head slightly as he leaned in for a soft kiss. His lips brushed yours, leaving behind the familiar taste of movie night.  “And I love you.”

You melted against him, body too warm as the butterflies in your stomach stirred back to life. “Oh, Copia,” you sighed. “I love you, too.”

might turn these into a series? idk.

[riality-check]

Things you said through someone else -- steddie! For the ask thingy 😄💛

(This is so old but I finally have the energy and the idea for it, so here we go!)

Steve cheers every time it starts raining. He's not a fan of getting rained on, and lightning makes him uneasy after a few too many trips to the Upside Down, but rain means people stay inside, and when people stay inside, they're not at Family Video.

It is dead, and it is glorious.

Robin amuses herself by stacking as many tapes as she can on the front counter. She's up to twenty seven and has climbed onto the counter to keep the tower going. Steve occasionally blows on it , just to see the tower shake and laugh as Robin frantically tries to stabilize it.

He bets she'll make it to thirty six before it falls. There's no way she'll make it all the way to the ceiling.

While Robin stacks the tapes, Steve relays the story Dustin told him, in typical dramatic Dustin fashion, about Eddie cancelling Hellfire last night in favor of going to see a local band they really like at a bar a few towns over. He's almost at the point where he has to do an impression of Dustin doing an impression of Eddie, which is as ridiculous as it sounds, when the bell on the front door rings.

Rather than groan aloud, Steve and Robin send each other matching help me looks.

Robin hops down from the counter but makes no move to dismantle her teetering tower of tapes. Steve looks around them to see Eddie and the guys from his band walking in and brushing the rain off their jackets.

"Hey guys," he says because he knows them, he's been to a few band practices. "What's up?"

Eddie beams at the sound of Steve's voice and waves very dramatically, but he doesn't say anything. Instead, he writes something down in red crayon on what has to be an absolutely drenched notepad. He passes it to Gareth, who rolls his eyes.

"Eddie lost his voice last night at the show, but that didn't stop him from dragging us here," he says. His own voice is scratchy, and Eddie elbows him for his dead tone.

Robin rolls her eyes, amused.

"Okay, but why come here?" Steve says. "If you're not feeling well-"

Jeff pokes Eddie. "Come on. You're the one who dragged us here because you can't talk."

"Well, all of us didn't need to be here," Archie adds.

"All of us have to witness this," Jeff says, and Archie nods, satisfied.

Eddie waves his hands frantically in an unmistakable stop talking gesture before he keeps writing on his notepad.

Steve tries valiantly not to laugh. One look at Robin's matching expression of these guys are ridiculous ruins it instantly.

Eddie makes eye contact with him, and Steve watches as he turns bright red as he keeps writing.

That totally doesn't do anything to Steve. Nope. Not at all. Because he totally didn't realize that he might not have completely heterosexual feelings for Eddie as of... last week.

Okay, they've been around for longer, a lot longer, but Steve wasn't able to catch on to that until very recently.

Other people's emotions? Easy, very clear. His own? No thank you.

Eddie tears off the top sheet of the notepad and hands it to Gareth.

"Jesus, Eddie, I can't read this," he says, and he passes it to Archie.

He takes it, squints, and says, "I refuse to read this."

Steve has never seen Eddie look more embarrassed. It shouldn't be as cute as it is.

Jeff snatches the note out of Archie's hand, and reads, out loud, "I was out last night and all I could think of was how much better of a time I would have had if you were there. Date, Saturday, 7:00, I'll pick you up, yes/no?"

Everyone freezes. Gareth and Archie stare at Eddie incredulously, Jeff holds the note far away from him, like it'll give him cooties, Eddie has his head in both of his hands, Robin looks one stiff breeze away from a laughing fit, and Steve-

Wait. Eddie feels the same way?

And then Robin's tape tower clatters to the floor, breaking the silence.

"Eddie, that's some middle school shi-"

"Damn, okay, guess we weren't enough fun for you, I'm joking, I promise-"

"Oh my god you couldn't even wait-"

"Yeah," Steve says.

Everyone stops and looks at him. Eddie takes his head out of his hands, big eyes hopeful.

"It's a date," Steve says. "But I'm driving, maniac."

Eddie's smile is blinding, and then, all at once, his friends pile on him.

"Let's go!" Jeff yells.

"I can't believe that shit work- ouch, Archie."

Robin laughs with them and gives Steve a hug of her own.

"You're never letting him live this down, are you?" she whispers.

"Absolutely not," Steve says.

"Alright, get out of here!" Robin says when she pulls back. "Get some vocal rest and find someplace dry that isn't here. You'll attract customers if you stay, and God knows we don't want that."

The guys laugh, high-fiving Steve and Robin on the way out.

Eddie is the last to leave. Steve can tell he wants to talk, can see how he opens his mouth before he remembers that no sound will come out.

"See you Saturday," he says for him.

Eddie nods and leaves when Archie yells at him to unlock the van.

Steve watches them pull out of the lot as Robin starts reassembling her tape stack.

When a car pulls into the lot and out comes a mother and her two kids who will definitely take every tape off the shelf and definitely ask too many questions and actually will make them work, Steve and Robin look at each other and say, in unison:

"Goddammit."

There are some people even the rain won't stop.

Though, Steve supposes as the bell on the front door rings, maybe that's a good thing.

Prompts here.

[hotchfiles]

hey, congrats on 100!! wanted to request seth cohen with the prompt “i would do anything not to give a shit, but i do” thanks so much!!

lari's 100th follower bash + send me a prompt and one of my boys for a blurb

seth + “i would do anything not to give a shit, but i do”

      His eyes haven't left you from the moment he barged into your room, the close friendship you shared allowing him to be as impertinent as he wished. Your own glanced him from time to time through your mirror as you worked on your makeup.

      You had a date. An actual date. Cohen was not going to ruin that for you.

      "So you're actually doing this, you're really going out with him."

      If you allowed yourself to delve more into the terrible heart wrenching crush you had on the curly boy laying your bed, you would tell yourself his voice sounded disappointed, sad even. But you promised yourself you wouldn't do that anymore. Not holding your love life back because Seth might look at you softly once in a while, or because he would sleep on your lap while showing you one of his underrated tv shows that would surely be canceled in two seasons max.

      "Oh no, I just enjoy uncomfortable clothes and spending two hours on my makeup. The usual."

      Seth's response to your sarcasm was to scoff annoyingly loud and roll on your bed to look up your ceiling, trying to think of anything he could say or do that could stop you.

      He couldn't just lock the door and swallow the keys even though that was the first option to come to mind. a fake allergy attack wouldn't work, you knew of everything he was allergic to. He could just ask you not to—but then you'd ask why.

      And he didn't know why. He just didn't want you to. It was unnerving to think of you having fun with another guy with your silly pretty dress and your red lipstick he never saw you wear before.

      And he couldn't even blame on your date. He was a cool normal guy, not some kind of awful jock.

      "Well, I mean, it's Firefly night, you never miss Firefly night. Are you coming home before it airs or—" Seth didn't finish his pleads, the way you looked at him was enough of an answer, you didn't even like Firefly that much, your biggest enjoyment out of it was Nathan Fillion being a hottie and... Cohen's company.

      You sigh deeply, avoiding his gaze as you went directly to your shoes, trying to find something remotely elegant for a dinner.

      Of course you would rather be laying on his couch, eating popcorn, cozy on his blanket that always smells like him, laughing at his jokes and pretending to be offended when he thought you didn't understand one of them. But the more you did that, the more you lost precious opportunities to find someone to actually be with you. Love you.

      "But like, you don't even know him." Not true, he was older than you both, but he graduated from the same high school only months before. "And he's not even tall." He was taller than you though. "And he has a terrible taste in socks."

      "Socks, Cohen? Really?" you groan in frustration, at him and at the fact not one of your heels matched your dress. Too high, too black, too thin, too tall. Nothing matched. "Why do you care?" you ask finally, your hands on your hips as you looked over at him, who, sensing you were getting madder by the second, decided to get up and just sit on your bed, looking into your eyes. "Do I need your blessing? Do I have to ask you before going out with someone? Why, why do you care?"

      "I don't know! Okay. I don't know." His body jumps from your bed, pacing out through your room, avoiding your eyes at all costs. "I would do anything not to give a shit, but I do." He stops on his tracks, his breathing is loud, was it ever that loud? Or were you both just too quiet?

      You think you're gonna regret this, but you step even closer to him, planning to possibly ruin your friendship but to at least get a single kiss before it happened.

      Seth looks at your lips and like many times before he wonders how soft they are, if the lipstick you had on tastes like cherries like your balm you usually wear and forces on his lips with your fingers.

      Would your thighs be warm around his waist? Would his cold hands on your cheeks scare you away? Just the usual stuff a good friend would think about his friend who is also a girl.

      He acts on impulse as do you, both of you going for a kiss at the same time, laughing at how uncoordinated it felt because of it, noses hitting before your lips could touch. But they do eventually.

      Seth notices the lipstick does not taste like cherries on your soft lips, it actually tastes awful, but he doesn't care. Your makeup is getting completely ruined, his fingers firm on your cheeks, but you're more than happy to let that happen.

      The kiss doesn't linger, the need for air even stronger due to the surprise of it all, his forehead touches yours lightly, his hands never leave your face. "Firefly night is just... Very important to me." You nod at his joke, too stunned to even laugh.

      "Your house then." It's not a question, you let go of him and he groans missing how warm you felt. You put on the first pair of slippers you can find and pull his hand as you left your room. Not a single plan to watch the stupid show in mind.

[orange-demons-deactivated2024]

Can you please write some jealousy hcs for sf6 Luke, Ed, Jamie and Bosch? If you want to do different characters that's ok or if they are too many you can just do some. Thank you !!!

fun fact: this was originally supposed to be released 2 days ago but guess who accidentally deleted half of it. :| soo it had to be rewritten again. so sad. also I think you can tell who i like based on the length of the hcs, oops

Luke

For the most part, Luke's a pretty chill guy so things don't bother him as much as they used to when he was younger.

He's glad to see you expand your horizons and meet new people along the way, especially finding new masters to train under.

He wants to see how far you've come from the last time he saw you, so he asks for a quick sparring match.

And you'd exceeded his expectations!

He's happy to see you develop your own style and dominate the streets.

"Woah, you've really stepped up your game," he said, genuinely impressed.

One thing though...why do you fight like a certain drunken boxer he knows?

Oh, You're learning under Jamie? Cool. Cool.

He's smiling but you can feel the tension behind it.

Luke is definitely the type of jealous that tries to play it off in a joking manner.

"Let's just say, I've had a couple of run-ins with the guy." he forced a chuckle. "He's...something else."

"Sounds like there's more to the story."

"Maybe there is, but it doesn't matter. What matters is that you're growing into an incredible fighter, and I'm proud of you for that." He pulled you in to press a kiss on your temple.

"Thanks, Luke. That means a lot coming from you."

"Anytime," he said, reaching out to ruffle your hair playfully. "And hey, if Jamie gives you any trouble, you let me know, okay?"

"Of course." you laughed, swatting his hands away.

"Come on, let's grab something to eat. I'm starving, and I bet you could use a bite after all that."

"Sweet! But you're buying."

You're your own person and you get to decide who you want to train under, but it still nags at him from somewhere deep within.

It may sound selfish of him, but he would rather you come to him for your concerns than anyone else. In part as your Coach and boyfriend.

So when other people try to make moves on you, he's internally sizing them up as he gives them a once-over.

So even though he has a smile on his face, it never reaches his eyes.

But he won't bring it up this time since you held Jamie in such a high regard.

And he's not going to hold your hand for every decision you make, but he trusts you enough not to do anything behind his back.

He hates to admit it, but it does tick Luke off knowing that Jamie would rub it in his face in their next encounter, it's almost inevitable.

So he would have a couple of not-so-nice words for the guy the next time he sees him on the street.

Ed

Ed watched you near the gym entrance as he leaned against the heavy sliding doors. 

You were running late to your nightly meet-ups and you weren't responding to any of his messages leading up to now. 

He wouldn't have cared if something came up and you had to cancel your date with him, but you mentioned how excited you were about seeing him today that he didn't think you would've just dipped the last second. 

So he went on a whim and decided to pay the gym down the street a visit. 

And surprise, surprise, here you were. 

You were chatting with, what he could assume was your coach, in the middle of the room. 

Ed's eyes flickered at the way Luke lightly squeezed your shoulder with a certain fondness in his eyes.

Bastard. 

He didn't know if you were oblivious or dumb for not noticing, so he made himself known by stepping on the mats in your direction. 

His presence immediately drew your attention and your eyes lit up when you saw him approaching, stepping back from Luke you said, "Ed! What are you doing here?"

"You're late. We had plans, remember?"

"Oh, crap, I'm so sorry! I lost track of time and…" You sputtered an apology and some excuses that fell deaf on his ears but his attention was more focused on your chummy coach.

Ed's glare could paralyze most people with fear, but Luke observed the exchange with a curious expression.

Realizing you may be having a one-sided conversation you introduced the pair to each other.

Luke extended a hand with a friendly smile. "The name's Luke, I'm one of the coaches here at Buckler's.

"Yeah, I've heard about you." He said, not acknowledging Luke's hand, which made the former pull back.

"Ed's been teaching me a little bit of boxing on the side." You chimed in, wrapping your arms around him. 

Actually, it was a bit odd that he didn't immediately try to shake you off. But that meant his mind was somewhere else.

"You've taught them well, They're lucky to have you as a teacher." Luke replied, addressing Ed again.

"Right…" 

He shrugged the arm you were hanging onto. "You ready to head out?"

"Yeah, just let me grab my stuff real quick then we could go," you said, giving him a small peck on his cheek before heading toward the locker room, leaving the pair alone.

"Look I don't know what you're trying to play at and frankly I don't care, but it ends now." 

"Hey, man, I'm not trying to play at anything. I'm just their coach. We keep things professional here." Luke raised his hands in a placating gesture.

"Yeah? Well, you seem pretty damn friendly for just a coach." Ed scoffed, not buying it.

Luke sighed, dropping his hands. "I get it. You're protective of them, and that's fine. But you need to trust that I'm not crossing any lines."

"Trust ain't something I give out easily. And right now, nothing's telling me you deserve even a lick of it."

"Fair enough," Luke said, crossing his arms. "But you should know that Y/n's here because they want to get stronger. And I'm not going to stop coaching them because you're feeling insecure."

"Insecure? Now you're just spouting crap." Ed narrowed his eyes.

"I don't think so." Luke hummed.

You quickly reappeared from the locker room with a bag slung over your shoulder. 

"Ready!" You said cheerfully, grabbing Ed's hand. "Alright, I'll see you later, Coach!" You called over your shoulder as you dragged the boxer towards the exit.

"Take care. And keep on practicing your footwork," he gave you a small wave. 

"Oh, and Ed," Luke said with a slight edge to his tone, making Ed turn to face him, "Take your shoes off the next time you step on my mats, won't you?"

Ed scoffed, with a smirk tugging on his lips. At least, he ain't no pushover.

You glanced between the two, sensing the underlying tension but not quite catching the full meaning of Luke's remark.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing, Just gym etiquette."

Jamie

With Jamie, he doesn't get jealous as easily as other people on this list. But he definitely has his gripes from time to time.

Woah, Pulling punches during a dance battle? Didn't see that one coming.

You told him you've been learning boxing from a guy who's been hanging around the beat square subway station, at least three times a week.

He was wondering what you've been up to.

Wait, did you say three times a week? That's more than you see him.

What's up with that?

He didn't mind you picking up new skills, especially with something as badass as boxing, but he missed your late-night talks.

And now, it was basically cut in half thanks to this Ed guy.

So he thinks it's time to give him a little visit from the infamous Jamie Siu, himself.

"Ah, now I get it." Jamie playfully circled him. "You got the whole bad boy get up and everything, huh?"

Ed looked up from his phone with an unreadable expression, "You gotta problem wit' me or something?" 

"Not at all buddy. I'm just trying to see who Mooncake's been hanging out with."

You sighed, telling him that Ed is just your Boxing coach and he's teaching you how to wield Psycho Power.

Nothing more, nothing less.

After adverting the crisis that was about to break out at the station, you would give Ed a quick apology before leaving with Jamie. 

Ed shrugged, saying 'whatever' and went back to his phone. 

You would have to confront him about his attitude later on.

Even if he felt jealous of where your focus was, you're still learning how to street fight. And he has no right to interfere with your training with your other Coaches. 

He shrugged at your concerns before asking if you wanted to try this new concoction he put together, offering the lip of his gourd to you. 

"Jamie, I'm being serious." You pushed the bottle back to him. 

"So am I."

You hardly picked up the way his eyes bore into your soul before he broke into a grin, taking a swig of his drink.  "Nothing like a good drink to ease the nerves."

When you tell him you're still upset with him about today, he'll lean up against the rails and cross his arms. 

Most of his jealousy stems from the fact that you're spending more time with other people than him. And he feels a tad bit neglected.

He's used to being isolated so the feeling isn't new to him. But he found himself staring at the space beside him where he expected to find your presence.

The times when you don't visit him, his mind wanders to the silly little adventures you'd tell him about and the places you get to see around the world.

But you have a track record of being gone for long periods of time and he just waits here, until you came back.

It's not your fault. He was just being a hard-ass, so he would be the one to apologize. 

"Look, I know you're still starting out and learning new stuff, which is cool n' all but I miss our nights together. And if it's that important to you, I'll back off. Just make sure to stop by from time to-time. 'Kay?"

"I will…And thanks, Jamie. I really appreciate it."

After a beat of silence, you gestured to the gourd resting beside you two. "Now, about that concoction of yours."

Jamie broke out in a grin, handing it to you. "Prepare to be amazed. The new and improved recipe is made from the ingredients you brought from Tian Hong Yuan. It's got a kick to it, just like you."

You both would've retired for the night in a drunken stupor, entangled in each other's arms.

He snuggled his face in the crook of your neck with a dumb smile, mumbling how much he loved you.

But next time you visit Ed, Jamie gives you a couple of 'souvenirs' to show off to your friend to show who you belong to. 

Bosch

You know, when you decided to stroll through town, Bosch didn't expect you to pick up another Master.

If anything, he guessed it was your eagerness that made people naturally gravitate to you.

He could tell how much you admired Rashid's wind abilities and charming personality, but it still irked him more than he cared to admit.

You would spend the majority of your days training and chatting with Rashid, eventually kicking Bosch to the curb.

He knew it was nothing more than a student-teacher relationship, especially since Rashid's wind techniques were something you wanted to master.

And the thing is, Rashid isn't even a bad guy.

He's just very charismatic, in a way that can be overbearing at times.

But he still couldn't shake the pangs of jealousy that gnawed at his soul.

With every new move that clicked, you would glance at Bosch to see if he noticed.

He's at least a little glad you still sought him out, despite your attention being elsewhere.

Maybe that's why he let it go on for so long.

He'll sit on his emotions and let the feeling bubble in his stomach before he would ever confront you about it. 

He probably even lets out a few snippy remarks if you keep pushing him away.

He doesn't mean it.

He never does, but Bosch has never been in a relationship before, so he doesn't know what to do whenever he felt the burning sensation of jealousy below the surface of his skin.

Bosch sat by the window sill and let the cool midnight breeze brush against his face.

He should've been relaxing, but his mind was anything but calm.

He heard the soft creak of the floorboards as he turned to see you approaching. 

You sat next to him by the window, offering some food you got from the markets. 

Your presence instantly eased his nerves as you both sat in the dark, listening to the distant sounds of the city.

Sensing Bosch's off demeanor, you asked what was on his mind.

"I'm just thinking." He said, sipping his drink.

"About what?"

"You." His eyes met yours, "…and Rashid."

You blinked in surprise. "Rashid? What about him?"

"It's just…you've been spending so much time with him. I get that he's your new master and he's teaching you a lot, but it feels like there's no time for us anymore."

"I didn't know you felt that way, but I'm sorry for not noticing sooner." You said aimlessly playing with his hands before tangling them together.

Bosch sighed, looking down at your intertwined hands. "You don't owe me an apology. I know I'm being hard-headed. I just…I wish I could open up to you more."

"You can always talk to me about anything, Bosch. And you don't need to force yourself to do so for my sake."

He looked up, meeting your eyes again. "I know. It's just hard sometimes. And seeing you with Rashid, makes me feel..."

"Jealous?"

"It's stupid, I know."

"I don't think it's stupid, it's a very human emotion. But I want you to know that no matter what, I'll always want to be here with you."

He hummed, still not taking your words to heart and opting to stare off into the night.

"How about this?" You scooted closer, resting your head on his shoulder, "I'll set aside more time for us, and you tell me whenever something's bothering you instead of bottling it up...Deal?"

A smile tugged on Bosch's face as he drew your intertwined hands closer, brushing his lips against your knuckles.

"Deal."

[suguru-getos]

genshin men when they see you glam up for the first time

characters included: kaveh, alhaitham, cyno, ayato

kaveh: now this man knows what he is doing when he proceeds to kiss you passionately, paying no mind to how your makeup might streak, how your perfect lipshade might be imprinted on his own lips. he will wear it like a badge of honor if you ask him to. just ask! <3 ever since you’ve been dating the master architect, you’ve never been too careful with your looks. it was the fact that you and him worked together for the ksharvar. mostly you were dressed in your akademiya attire. today however, was different, you were dressed beautifully, and the moment kaveh saw you. he dramatically kissed you, as if all the compliments he holds aren’t enough. as if whatever he’ll say won’t do justice. “sweetheart, gosh— i need to dress up too, need to match my lovely gorgeous of a baby,” kaveh retorted, rushing to get dressed as well 😤 man’s never going to let that troupe come to place. yk the troupe: homeless man x red carpet woman yeah. 🤦🏻‍♀️

alhaitham: now alhaitham knows how beautiful you are, either way, he keeps telling you how perfect your features are. how precious you look & how adoring he finds you whenever your lips curl into the most beautiful smile ever. but nothing 👏 nothing prepares him for when you glam up & doll up for him. getting ready for his birthday. alhaitham is speechless, the only emotions on his face are of pure flustered shock, he can’t imagine you could look THIS AMAZING! “and a happy birthday to me,” alhaitham smiles softly, raising. brow and snaking his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. “you looking this good almost makes me want to cancel all the plans.” you gingerly push his chest away, a blush creeping onto your cheeks. “stop it— haitham,”

cyno: this man decided it would be a FAIRLY GOOD TIME to crack a joke over your beauty. no— it is not even a joke. it is some annoying line he uses like: “did it hurt?” while you blink, confusion all your face. “what do you mean cyno?” he walks closer to your face, holding your chin and leaning in, whispering softly. “when you fell down from the heaven for me, angel face?” please— the deadpan you had on your face. followed by bursts of giggling. “cyno please— that line is so bad, so fucking bad—” you whine out, rolling your eyes and getting back to the final touches of your makeup. “maybe i can makeup for them, in other ways,” normally, general mahamatra knows how flustered you get when he talks like this, but this time… you’ve been craving him so long! that you caved in almost instantly. “yes please— make it up to me!” maybe he will 🫡

ayato: the whole estate was ordered empty, ayaka being busy in the festival that was hosted. thoma accompanying her. ayato told the shumatsuban to take care of lady ayaka’s security. all to have some much needed time with his beloved being in the whole wide world. “now than, if any distractions are gone i sugge-” his jaw slacked, watching you turn towards him in the most beautiful kimono ever. it had the kamisato emblem as well. “i- wow, you truly accentuate the clan just by your presence,” ayato was awestruck, smiling brightly towards you. “good thing i rendered this place empty. they won’t hear your moans when i’m done worshipping your body,”

[reidmania]

JUST US

Miguel o’hara

summary; both oblivious to each others feelings, you both fuck around with other people to try and forget each other, but it never works.

warnings; mentions of sex but no smut? sexual references miscommunication, swearing, miguel and reader being oblivious, fem reader, angst w happy ending

it was difficult for miguel, watching you with that bright smile on your face, the way your whole face lit up as you danced around the room, hanging up christmas decorations, laughing at jokes others threw your way.

he wanted to be the one making you laugh.

he didn’t even notice the slight smile on his face as he stood in the doorway watching you, everyone else noticed though.

“miggy!” you say excitedly as you pause in front of him, “wanna decorate the christmas tree with me” you say, the cutest smile on your face, he feels his stomach knot.

it hurts him so much.

he pictures what it would be like for you and him to decorate your christmas in your very own home, drinking hot coco, watching christmas movies, cuddle on the couch. he wants to give you the world. he would do anything to have you in his arms, just once.

but he is a runner, these things scare him, and seeing how much control you have over him, scares him, and you have no idea. everytime you mention another guy, or going on a date with someone, miguel instantly assumes you’ve fucked them, and it kills.

he wants to be the one taking you out on dates, treating you as well as you deserve, giving you the world and more, everything, he wants to give you everything.

but if you were interested in miguel, you wouldve made a move by now.

you were so oblivious to his feelings for you, missing how he only smiled when you were around, how his tone got softer if you were in the room, making sure HQ had all your favourite things, and was fit to your standard

he never did that for anybody else, how could you miss it.

he assumed you just weren’t interested.

“sorry darling, i have a date” he said softly, wishing the date was with you, if you asked him once more he would cancel the date instantly, and spend all day decorating the damn tree with you.

he doesn’t even like christmas.

if he looked hard enough, he wouldve seen your face fall for a second, couldve noticed the million thoughts running through your head, but he missed it, and your smile remained.

“oh! thats okay miggy, have a good time” you say, hand now fidgeting with your necklace. he smiles at you.

you two were friends, best friends, ever since you came to the HQ miguel just had a soft spot for you, you were like an angel.

and then that soft spot turned into love.

miguel loved you, there was no doubt. he loved you so much it had begin to physically hurt him, he did have a date, that was true, but not a romantic sort of date. a quick fuck date, one where he hoped he would be distracted from all his thoughts of you, though it never worked, he would keep trying.

he wanted it to be you.

there was a sort of gut wrenching pain, hearing miguel call you darling then say he was going on a date with someone else, a million thoughts ran through your head, was this a new person or maybe an old one.

you new he fucked every girl he went on a date with, a new girl each week, you knew that because he always came back with different energies, and hickeys in different spots.

one girl covered him in them, he didn’t like that, the next left a few on his chest, he didn’t like that either, and the one after that left a few on his neck, and a few on his collarbone, he never seemed to like it.

but you had a conversation with him about hickey’s before, he said he liked them, he liked giving them and liked receiving them, maybe these girls just didn’t have the right placement.

you wanted to love miguel, you do love miguel. and you wouldve taken a chance and asked him out, if you didn’t know how every date went.

he would take them out, fancy restaurant, then fuck them, and ditch them.

and you loved miguel too much to just be used.

maybe he had a thing with commitment, a issue maybe, he was scared of it, or just couldn’t handle not being able to sleep with multiple women.

you refused to be used by miguel, not when you loved him with everything you have.

the next day, you saw a cute christmas sweater on your desk, with a smile you throw it on over your head, seeing others walking around with them on.

“i ordered them in, figured we could all match, but miguel doesn’t seem to think he wants to, can you talk to him?” lyla says, when she sees you, you frown, and nod. “yeah- yeah of course”

walking to miguels office scared you, you wondered where the hickeys would be placed today, if he liked them, you wondered if maybe this girl was different, maybe she was exactly what he wanted.

knocking on the door, you hear a grunt, then a come in, you walk in, plastering a smile on your face. “hi miggy” you say.

he smiles at the sight of you, the christmas sweater was a bit too big, handing down to your mid thigh. “hey darling,” he says, sitting up straighter in his chair.

“youre not matching with us?” you say, tilting your head as you sit on the other side of him, placing your elbows on the desk, holding your face.

“its not my kind of thing” he says. you pout, “come on miggy, its cute, match with me” you say, smiling.

he sighs, christmas always meant wearing whatever you pleased, miguel, obviously chose grey sweatpants and a black compression shirt, making you squeeze your thighs together, but you stayed quiet.

“yeah- okay” he says, turning around to pull off his shirt, you watch his back tense with a smile, as he pulls the christmas sweater over his head. “see miggy! its cute” you study him, unable to find any hickeys

“no hickeys today?” you say softly, “what happened” you asked, knowing it would probably leave you more hurt then you already are.

“i fucked up, and she left” miguel shrugged. he didn’t seem to bothered by it. you hate the fact it makes you happy. “what did you do?” you ask softly, tilting your head.

“said someone elses name” he runs a hand over his face, your jaw drops, as you laugh softly. but it wasn’t genuine, he was thinking of someone else.

“oh that would fucking suck” you say softly, with a smile, he shrugged, “its okay, hey are you coming to the christmas party tonight?” he asks, he hoped you were since he arranged it just for you.

you giggle, “of course i am”

“good ill see you there”

miguel was now clenching the drink in his hand, watching you talk to some guy, some guy that wasn’t him. he hated it. all he wanted was you, even if it was just for one night, he would happily be discarded by you if it meant having you at all.

you refused to be discarded by miguel, you didn’t want to be one of his one night stands, fuck then dumps, you wanted to love him.

miguel was standing outside on the balcony when you came out, “hi migs” you mutter, walking towards him. you looked gorgeous. perfect like always.

“hey baby” he says, cracking his neck softly, as he looks down at you, your stomach flipped at the name, but you assumed he was drunk.

this was unfair, on you and the girl he was thinking about, he thought about her enough to say her name while fucking somebody else, yet he was standing here calling you baby.

your smile dampens, and he notices. “hey hey whats up?” he says, grabbing your chin softly to make you look at him. “nothing, i think im just tired” you say.

miguel holds eye contact with you, heart pounding in his chest. “need me to take you home?” he asks softly, knowing you didn’t have a ride. you smile, “if thats okay- you don’t have to i don’t wanna ruin your night if your having a good time”

miguel shakes his head, “never, come on” he says grabbing your hand leading you to his car.

theres a lot of tension in the car, your not sure why, miguel keeps looking over at you, and you’re always looking at him. his hand is on your knee, this doesn’t feel like a just friends thing.

he reaches your house, and pauses looking at you. “you sure you’re alright?” he asks softly. you nod, looking into his eyes, theres a lot of tension, you don’t reply. “whos name did you say” you ask softly.

“what?”

“you said someone elses name, fucking that chick last night, whos name was it, whos name did you say miguel”

“it doesn’t matter” he says, shaking his head, looking down at you.

“it does”

“baby-“ you can’t help it, you lean over smashing your lips into his, he is shocked at first, wondering if this was real, or if it was all in his head, but he kisses back, seizing the opportunity, never knowing if it’ll happen again.

he can taste you, vanilla and cherries, so so so sweet against his lips, he wonders if he is in heaven.

he groans, pulling you over the centre console to sit on his lap, your hands are now in his hair as one of his is on your back, pulling you closer, the other on the back of your neck.

its messy, passionate but messy, you roll your hips against him, subconsciously, causing him to groan loudly against your lips.

“baby” he says softly, in between kissing you. “mm” you hum in response, caught in the moment, maybe being used by miguel would be okay.

“yours” he says, pulling away. “what?” you ask confused, “your name, i said your name.” he admits quietly. you pause, in shock.

“you said my name- you were thinking of me?” you ask. he scoffs, “of course i was all i ever do is think of you, all the time, everyday, its always you, i can’t get you out of my head” he says.

you pause. “i- i don’t want to be another girl you fuck then leave” you say, “i- i can’t do it, not when i love you so much” you say, pushing your hands to his chest as you open the car door, climbing out.

he is in shock by your confession, it jabs him in the heart — all the sleeping around he did to forget you, didn’t work, yet it scared you into the idea that you would just be a quick fuck to him.

“no- what no listen to me” he says undoing his seatbelt as he gets up to follow you. “miguel i think its best if you leave- i can’t do this, im sorry but i cant be used by you” you say.

“you aren’t!!” he said, grabbing ur hand pulling you to look at him. “you- fuck, i dont sleep with women to fuck and leave them- i mean thats what ive been doing but i do it to try and forget you, to try to forget the way my heart leaps out of my fucking chest everytime you touch me, to forget the sound of your voice, to forget your cute smile, and pretty hair, i do it all to try and forget how much i love you, and how everytime i am with these women, i want it to be you, i want to be the one to take you out on those cute dates, i want you to be the one i am seeing everyday, i want you to be the one giving me hickeys where everybody can see them, and i hate when other women do it, cause they try to mark me as theres, but im yours. im only yours i want to be yours”

by the end of his rant, miguel is out of breath, everything he had been holding in had come pouring out, standing in the street with nothing but the dim street lamp as a source of light, and how you looked so pretty standing under the yellow.

“i love you” he says, chest heaving, “i love you and i want to love you” he says, you squeeze his hand gently, he knew you were shocked, he knew how you would need a moment to process this, and he knew that you squeezing his hand was to tell him you heard it all, and you were listening, you just needed to process.

he knew you.

he loved you.

“i love you, miguel” you finally say, “i love you, and i want to show you i love you, i want to do all the stupid cringey couple things with you, i want everyone to know how much i love you, i want the yuck feeling in my stomach to go away everytime i hear you mention some other girl, i want to love you” you say, holding his hand to your chest as you hold eye contact with him.

“no one else, no other girls, just us, me and you, just us” he says.

“just us”

[reputationmunson]

Bad Habit | pt. 2 | Eddie Munson x harrington!reader

part one

summary: The truth comes out

word count: 5.0k

cw: smut (18+), fluff, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, oral (m&f receiving), afab!reader, use of y/n, mentions of drinking, swearing, she/her pronouns

a/n: first of all, i just wanted to thank everybody for all the love part one received! secondly, reader is adopted, so there is no mention of resembling Steve. thank you for reading :)

Steve thinks you’re acting unusual.

You’re barely home anymore, you whisper every time you use the phone, he’s pretty sure he spotted a hickey on your neck about a month ago and you’re always in a good mood.

For example, yesterday morning Steve accidentally woke you up because he was unaware you were home and he was expecting you to flip out on him or at least scowl at him.

Instead, you thanked him for waking you up so you could watch the sunrise…

So yeah, he’s a little suspicious.

All signs point to you being in a relationship and as your older brother he’s hoping it’s literally anything else. You guys live in a small town and he’s well aware that most of the guys here are total douchebags.

He even asked Robin and Nancy if you had said anything, but they knew nothing. Though both of them did agree that you’d been more on the chipper side lately.

If you are dating somebody, he isn’t surprised you haven’t said anything to him. Growing up with absentee parents, Steve was a little protective of you.

He goes into your room to try to get some information out of you but you aren’t home…

Shocker

_

“Eddie stoooop! I can’t breathe!” You say through laughter.

You’re currently in the middle of a tickle war in your boyfriend's bed.

Okay, war might not be the best word because it isn’t much of a fight.

“Fine. I will concede… for a kiss” He stops tickling you and anticipates your lips on his any second now.

“Hmm… I’m not sure if that offers good enough” You’re bluffing

“Let me prove it to you?” He smirks

You sit up and capture him in a kiss. It’s sweet and unhasty, like you have all the time in the world.

He eventually pulls away and stares into your eyes.

“What’s the verdict?”

You can’t stop smiling. You’ve been awake for barely ten minutes and Eddie’s had you smiling ever since you opened your eyes.

“Think I need another one to make sure you’re forgiven” He’s already leaning down to give you another kiss.

This time, the kiss grows more fervent. Before you know it, Eddie is pulling you on top of him.

His hands are roaming all over your body and when he gives your ass a delicate squeeze, you let out a quiet moan.

“Fuck, I hate to do this but I gotta get up. I’m working on Steve’s car today before his shift”

You rest your forehead on his shoulder and let out a sigh. He kisses your head in apology.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, Munson”

“Being cute is my specialty”

You both smile and you roll off of him. “Apparently humble isn’t” you joke.

He laughs and gets out of bed. You don’t miss the opportunity to admire him and if his back wasn’t turned from you he'd definitely make fun of you a little bit for being so obsessed with him.

He wouldn’t be wrong.

“Alright, I guess I should head out so we don’t get there at the same time. Don’t need Steve connecting any dots”

You gather all your stuff up while Eddie gets dressed.

“Don’t you dare think you’re getting out of here with a proper goodbye” He steps over to you to give you a goodbye kiss.

He holds your face in his large hands and it would be so easy to fall back into bed to finish what you both started, but Eddie’s too kind to cancel on Steve.

Dammit

“Tell me how much you’re gonna miss me” He smiles widely and you giggle

“Maybe I can show you tonight instead” You compromise and the look on his face lets you know that’s a great idea.

You give him one last peck and reluctantly walk out to your car.

You’re aware that having your car at Eddie’s might not be the smartest idea considering Max lives right across from him, but sometimes you can’t risk being dropped off down the street of your house the next morning.

Luckily for you, you’re her favorite (don’t tell Steve), so she doesn’t plan on ratting out seeing your car at Eddie’s. She also can’t really be bothered.

Max thinks it would be sweet if you and Eddie are an item. Don’t tell anyone she thinks that, though. She’ll deny any accusations.

_

“Good morning, Stevie” You say, walking into the kitchen.

“Good morning to you too, stranger. Stay at Laura’s again?”

“Oh. yeah. She’s been a little down lately so I just wanna be a good friend” You fib.

Laura has been your alibi since you and Eddie got together. She’s the only other person aware of what’s going on and it’s a safe option since she’s your closest friend who doesn’t hang out with your brother.

“Hm I guess that explains why you whisper every time you’re on the phone. Must be pretty personal?”

Your eyes widen for a split second before you act natural.

“That’s the reason. Super personal, Steve, you shouldn’t be eavesdropping. Anyways… what are you up to today?” You change the subject

“Eddie’s coming over to work on my car before I go to work” He says with a mouthful of cereal.

“Cool… I’m gonna go get ready for the day!” You scurry upstairs.

You knew it was going to be hot outside today so you decided on wearing your shortest shorts and a crop top. You’re definitely only wearing this because of today's forecast. No other reason.

_

Eddie looks so unfairly sexy while working on Steve’s car and it has you in tizzy.

You were watching him through the living room window, but when he put his hair in a low bun and took his shirt off, you had to go to your room to distract yourself.

Feeling bored, you decided he must be absolutely parched and could use a glass of water.

You grab two glasses of water for both of them and a bottle of beer for Eddie.

“I come bearing gifts” you announce walking over to them.

“Thanks, ba- bro. Thanks, bro” Eddie almost slips, but luckily Steve doesn’t realize anything.

“You didn’t bring me a beer?” Steve pouts.

“You have work soon. You want one get it yourself. You’re welcome, by the way”

Eddie chuckles and you can’t help but adore the sight of him.

Suddenly, You’re suddenly aware of the fact that Steve is watching you make eyes at Eddie.

“Well, um, I’m gonna go back inside.” You say and walk hastily inside.

“She’s been so weird. Do you think she’s acting differently lately?” Steve asks Eddie.

“Weird how?” Eddie’s voice goes up an octave.

“I don’t know. I think she’s got a boyfriend and scared to tell me. Just because she’s my younger sister doesn’t mean I’m gonna murder the guy she’s dating”

“Dude, when I first met her you threatened to shave my eyebrows off if I even thought about her.” Eddie cringes as he brings this up.

“That’s different. You’re one of my best friends it would be fucked up if you were…canoodling my sister.”

“Oh yeah. Definitely fucked up. Um, anyways, does she at least seem happy and stuff?” Eddie asks and hopes it doesn’t sound too obvious that he is in fact canoodling his best friend's sister.

“Annoyingly happy. She’s always smiling like it would kill her if she stopped. It’s creepy” Eddie looks away from Steve because he can’t contain the ginormous smile on his face.

“Well when you meet him, just try to keep in mind how happy she’s been lately.” He says in hopes that when Steves inevitably finds out, he’ll remember this conversation.

It’s highly unlikely.

“Alright, your car is good to go. Wanna make sure she starts?” Eddie suggests and Steve gets in the car. Both boys cheer at the sound of his car starting.

“You’re a lifesaver. I gotta get ready for work but feel free to stick around and use the pool. Maybe keep an eye on y/n so she doesn’t invite over whatever asshole she’s dating.” Steve is half joking and Eddie gives an awkward chuckle.

_

While Steve is in the shower, Eddie finds his way into your bedroom.

You’re lying on your side reading a book, completely unaware of his presence. He stands in your doorway and admires you until he decides he wants to be a menace.

In true Eddie fashion, instead of saying something to make you notice him he jumps on top of you, making you yelp.

“Well that’s one way to get my attention” You say and set your book on your night stand.

“And you’re half naked. That’s the best way to get my attention.” Eddie says, referring to you being dressed only in a sports bra and the shortest shorts in existence.

Eddie grabs you and flips you so you’re on top of him. You can’t help but kiss him for a couple of minutes before pulling away to stop.

“We can’t.” A kiss. “Steve is home.” Another kiss. “Let’s go downstairs” You let your forehead rest on his and give him a chaste peck before moving off of him. You throw on a t-shirt and leave your bedroom.

“Guess what Steve told me while I was working on his car.” Eddie says while following you down the steps.

“What?”

“He thinks you have a boyfriend.”

“Fuck, he doesn’t know it’s you, right?”

You both sit on the couch and leave a respectable distance between each other.

“Are you kidding? We both know I would not be alive if that was the case. He wants me to hang out here so you don’t invite your mystery man over. Oh, and might’ve said something about you being insanely happy…”

“I am insanely happy.” I love you is what you really want to say.

“And you can hang out here. As long as you don’t mind going for a swim. It’s so hot outside I can barely stand being in these clothes” You lower your voice when you say the last part.

Before he can respond with a typical suggestive comment, Steve comes back downstairs to say goodbye before heading to work.

“Alright, I gotta head out. I won’t be home until late. You staying home tonight?” He asks you

“Oh, I don’t know. Laura hasn’t asked me to stay with her yet”

“Well, she can stay here, ya know? Unless there’s another reason…”

“Nope, not at all. You better get going, you don’t wanna be late!”

Eddie tries to keep a straight face and Steve leaves without another word.

It feels like an eternity before he pulls out of the driveway

“Up for a swim?”

Eddie nods quickly.

_

You’re trying to decide which bathing suit you want to wear and Eddie waits patiently on your bed. He turned on music to entertain him knowing it takes you ages to make a decision, but he isn’t complaining. He loves your look of concentration.

“Wear the red one,” He suggest. “You look sexy in red. Or maybe we should just go naked”

He wiggles his eyebrows

“Yeah, you’d like that. But on a day like this, I’m betting either our friends or the kids show up unannounced to use the pool”

“Yeah that would be just our luck”

You begin to get undressed and Eddie looks around your room to avoid being so obvious.

“Eds, you can look. Nothin you haven’t seen before”

“Just trying to be respectful, sweetheart”

“Since when?”

He laughs and finally looks at you. He feels like the air has been knocked out of him.

“I have a feeling Laura is definitely going to ask you to spend the night. Something tells me she’s really gonna need you tonight”

“Well, lucky for her, I’m in the mood to be a very good friend tonight”

“Hmm maybe we could postpone our swim so you can be a good friend right now” He pats his lap for you to join him.

“Can’t I be a good friend in the pool?” You’re already walking over to him to straddle his lap

“Maybe you can be now and later… if you catch my drift”

“I always catch your drift. You aren’t exactly subtle”

“Shut up and kiss me. I’m dying here”

You oblige quickly.

While lost in the kiss, you suddenly become aware of the fact that you’re completely naked while Eddie is fully clothed.

Your hands fly to the hem of his shirt and you quickly remove it so you can get back to kissing him.

His hands move to gently massage your tits and you moan into his mouth then start to grind on him slowly, making him moan in response.

He’s hard against you and you come to the conclusion that you want to give him some relief as soon as possible.

You take your lips off of his and trail kisses down his jaw and neck. You move into a position that allows you to kiss down his chest and stomach until you reach his happy trail.

You begin to gently suck and kiss at his happy trail and his breathing gets heavier. Usually he’s the big teaser, but you wanted to flip the script.

Your hand palms him through his jeans and he groans. “Baby, please.”

“Please, what?”

“Lemme take my pants off. Busting in my jeans isn’t exactly on my agenda”

You choose to be nice and start to take his pants off. Apparently you aren’t doing it fast enough because he stands up and removes his pants and boxers.

No matter how many times you’ve seen his cock, it still makes you drool.

“Lemme suck you off. Please”

“On your knees, baby”

You swiftly move to your knees when Eddie sits on the edge of your bed.

He looks down at you and admires the way you’re staring at his dick

“Get to it, love. Wanna cum in that pretty mouth”

You spit in your palm and give him a few pumps before wrapping your lips around him

At first, you just focus on the tip and swirl your tongue. He tries to stop his hips from thrusting so he can go deeper.

“Don’t tease me, pretty girl. You wanna make me feel good, don’t you?”

You nod and take him deeper. He lets out a loud moan and you begin to bob your head a little faster.

“Fuck, that’s it. Always take my cock so well”

After a few more seconds, you pull back and he whines. “Want you to be rough, Eddie. Don’t hold back”

He smirks and gathers your hair in his fist. “Smack my leg twice if it's too much. Got it?”

“Got it”

“Stick your tongue out for me, baby”

You listen and he taps his cock on your tongue a few times before fully putting it back in your mouth.

He starts thrusting slowly to warm you up. You whine to let him know you want it faster.

His pace starts to pick up and he looks down at you to make sure you’re alright

Your eyes are closed and he feels his dominant side creeping up on him.

“Eyes on me or you won’t be cumming at all today”

You open your eyes and look up at him. Your eyes are watery and your pupils are blown wide.

Fuck, he can’t believe your his girl

Eddie starts to fuck your throat relentlessly and you moan around him. Your hands hold his thighs and you squeeze them hard. He worries it's too much for you. “You okay?”

Neither of you have broken eye contact and you give him a nod to keep going.

Tears are spilling from your eyes and you look so fucking pretty it should be illegal.

“I’m gonna cum in that fucking mouth and you’re not gonna waste a drop. Want you to swallow all of it”

His thrusts grow sloppy and you know he’s about to finish

Soon his warmth fills your mouth and you’re both moaning. He can’t believe how much this turns you on.

He pulls out of your mouth and you gasp for air.

“Not too rough, right?” He takes your hand to help you off your knees

“Not at all. I liked it, just need a minute”

He smiles and moves to sit against your headboard. You go back to straddling him.

You bury your head in the crook of his neck and his arms wrap around you.

The two of you sit in a comfortable silence for a couple of minutes.

“Teddy” You whisper in a sing-song voice. He always knows you’re feeling vulnerable when you call him Teddy. “Yeah?”

You pull back to look at him.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Anything”

“I, uh, know we haven’t been together that long, but I really need to get this off my chest”

He mentally prepares himself for what you’re gonna say

“I love you. So much that I feel like I’m gonna explode and I’m sorry if it’s too soon or something but I just can’t hold it in anymore”

“Too soon? Psh. Pretty sure I fell in love with you first day I met ya”

“Really?” You smile so wide it almost hurts

“Really. Steve was talking shit about my music and you said something like ‘Steve, you cry listening to time after time by cindy lauper. I don’t think you should be talking’ and I just knew I wanted to be yours”

You both laugh at the memory and bask in the feeling of being total lovesick idiots.

After a few moments of silence, you speak up.

“I’m ready, Eds. I want you. Can’t imagine it being anyone else”

“You sure? I don’t mind waiting”

“One hundred percent sure. Now show me what ya got, Munson”

“How romantic. Lay down for me”

Unbeknownst to you, Robin is currently downstairs looking for you to see if you’re up for a swim. Little does she know, Eddie is currently eating you out like it’s his job.

Between the music in your room and being so lost in the moment, neither of you hear the footsteps approaching your room.

Robin isn’t exactly familiar when it comes to having boundaries and she swings your door open without knocking and is met with the sight of Eddie between your legs.

Both of you abruptly turn your heads and all three of you are frozen.

Robin quickly turns around but doesn’t move. “Oh, I’m sorry it seems I’ve opened to door to an alternate fucking dimension where this makes sense” If this was under different circumstances, this sentence probably would’ve made you laugh.

Without another word, she frantically walks out of your room

“Robin, wait!” You call after her and put your robe on to follow her. Eddie also gets up and gets dressed to follow the both of you.

“Am I suffering from heat exhaustion? Does that cause hallucinations? I need to sit down”

Robin sits on the couch, looking a little bit traumatized from walking in on you and Eddie.

Eddie giggles and you lightly elbow him.

You don’t really know what to say. You always assumed you would tell Steve first and then everyone would find out in a completely different way.

“So…” Eddie starts

“What the fuck did I just walk in on? I’m seriously confused”

“Well, ya see, Robin, when two people love each other-”

“That’s not what I mean, Munson. I mean- wait. Did you just say love? Like in love? Can someone please start explaining I wasn’t joking about the being confused part!”

“Okay” You breathe out “Eddie and I have been seeing each other for the past couple of months and it’s been going really great so we didn’t wanna tell anyone because we were scared that things might get complicated, especially if Steve knew”

“Oh my god I didn’t even think about Steve. He is going to kill you!” She points at Eddie

“We know that’s why you can’t tell anybody” He responds

“This is huge, guys! I have to tell somebody that you two are hooking up I am incapable of keeping this to myself” She gets up and begins to pace

“Rob, please you have to keep it a secret. I know it’s big but I promise we’ll tell Steve soon so you don’t have to keep it a secret too long”

“We will?” Eddie asks

“Eventually, yeah. We sort of have to. What, are we not gonna invite him to the wedding?” You realize what you’ve just said and your eyes widen. “I mean, we aren’t getting married. I just, um, what I meant to say was-”

“You’re adorable, ya know that?” He smiles at you and you forget Robin’s having a total freakout for a moment.

“Before you two start doing it on the coffee table, I need to know the details because as your best friend, I am truly offended you kept this from me”

All three of you sit down and you and Eddie tell her all about your relationship, obviously sparing the dirty details. (She’s going to try to get them out of you later).

“Aw, so you guys are in love! This is so great, especially for you, Eddie. y/n is most definitely out of your league”

He doesn’t hesitate to agree.

“I guess I should go to let you guys…continue. By the way, both of you owe me. I’m talking personal chauffeurs and buying me pretty gifts. Deal?”

“Deal”

“I’d love a ride to the mall tomorrow” She says, walking to the door.

“Bye, Robin!”

“So, was that a mood ruiner for you or…” Eddie asks

You stand up and extend your hand out to him. “C’mon”

He takes your hand and you lead him back up to your bedroom.

Eddie unties your robe and you let it fall to the floor. His clothes are off seconds after you lie back down on the bed.

He hovers over you and his eyes bore into yours, making you feel safer than you’ve ever felt.

“I love you”

“I love you, more” Your hand cups his cheek

“Impossible” He kisses your wrist before leaning down to kiss you properly.

“Do you have any condoms?” He asks in a hushed tone

“Don’t need one. I’m on the pill”

He smiles and gives you a passionate kiss

Eddie grabs his cock and guides in through your slick folds. You gasp when it hits your clit.

“Are you ready?” He asks

“More than ready” you smile up at him.

“Tell me if anything hurts, kay?”

“Kay”

He starts by just putting the tip in and you both moan at the same time.

“More. I’m okay”

He slowly goes a little bit deeper and gives you time to adjust before he starts to move.

“Fuck, you feel so good. You’re so fucking wet”

“You’re so big. Feels so good inside me”

His pace picks up a little and you pull him down so he’s laying on top of you and you wrap your arms around him.

You didn’t expect this to feel as good as it does. After hearing stories from friends, you expected it to be completely uncomfortable and awkward, but you haven’t experienced either of those feelings.

“I’m not gonna last much longer” He pants

His hand slides between your bodies and he starts to rub your clit, making your back arch.

His middle and ring finger work faster on your sweet spot and you feel like you’re seeing stars

“Please don’t stop I’m so close, Eddie”

“Me too, baby. Cum with me. Need to feel you cum around my cock”

Both of your moans are getting louder and Eddie lets out a deep groan when he feels you walls clench around him.

You feel Eddie’s cum fill you up and it sends you over the edge.

Your nails are scratching his back and he collapses on top of you, kissing your neck as you work through your orgasm.

Both of you lay there in silence and you run your fingers through his hair and he hums in gratitude.

“I’ll be right back” He says before leaving your bedroom.

He returns with a glass of water and a warm rag to clean you up.

He starts to clean you up and you hiss a little at the contact, making him look up at you warily.

“Sensitive. I’m okay”

Once he’s done, he moves to hold you in his arms.

“How was that? Wasn’t painful or anything, was it?”

“It was perfect. I never imagined it being that good”

You can practically see his ego inflate, but he deserves it.

“Me neither. Best I’ve ever had”

You roll your eyes, but he means every word.

You take a nap before going to Eddie’s and spend the rest of the day wrapped up in each other, making each new time the best you’ll both ever have.

_

It’s been two weeks since Robin found out and she’s been loving making you and Eddie her personal servants.

Even if you didn’t do these things for her, she still wouldn’t spill your secret, but she can’t deny that she’s enjoying it.

The group is spending the day enjoying your pool and you wore your red bathing suit that Eddie loves so much.

It’s almost impossible for him to keep his hands off of you

“y/n, would you be a dear and get me a drink from inside please?” She smirks at you and you have no choice but to compel

“Anything for my queen” You say before heading inside.

“Ugh, can someone look at this freckle on my shoulder. Is it concerning looking?” Robin tries to get a good look at her freckle but can’t get the right angle, so Eddie helps her out.

“Oh, it looks fine. y/n has one like that on her hip”

Steve immediately whips his head towards Eddie and shoots daggers at him.

“What?” Steve says through gritted teeth

“What?” Eddie’s eyes widen when he realizes what he’s done.

“How in the world do you know she has a freckle on her hip?”

“Um, everyone knows. She talks about it all the time, duh”

“You’re dead, man.”

When you walk outside and see Steve chasing Eddie around the pool, you don’t think anything of it until you hear Steve yell “I’m gonna fucking kill you” and your stomach drops.

He knows

Robin notices you and looks like she has no idea what to do

“y/n, I have it on good authority that Steve knows about you and Eddie”

You hurriedly give Robin her drink and join in the wild goose chase around the pool

“Steve, stop! You’re overreacting”

He halts, suddenly. “Overreacting? You’ve gotta be kidding me. How long has this been going on?”

“About two and a half months” you answer

“Two and a half months?!”

“C’mon, Steve. Lets just talk this out” Eddie tries to level with him

“Great idea. I’ll go first” Steve starts “You, Eddie Munson, have been doing my little sister and you’ve both been lying about it. What, you were tired of no one wanting to fuck you so you took advantage of her?”

“Hey! I’m not gonna stand here and let you talk about him like that! I’m an adult, Steve, I can make my own decisions. he’s not taking advantage of me I can’t believe you’d even say something like that”

“Babe, it’s okay-”

“Babe? Seriously? I feel like I’m in the goddamn twilight zone! Did you know about this?” He turns to look at Robin

“I, um, might’ve had some idea, but only because I walked in on them doing it!”

“Robin!” you and Eddie shout at the same time and she apologizes.

“Well, that’s just great. So all three of you were lying? I can’t believe this. You know he’s gonna leave you once he gets bored because that's what guys do, y/n”

“No, Steve. That's what you do” You argue back

Before it gets any more heated, Eddie walks over to you. He wraps his arm around you, pulling you close to him.

“I know you’re mad, but we aren’t just hooking up. I love her. I can promise you I’m not leaving her”

You see Steve’s face soften once Eddie says this. He’s always been a bit of a romantic.

“You mean that? You guys are like, in love and shit?”

Eddie looks at you and smiles. “Yeah. In love and shit”

Steve’s mood shifts entirely, like he was never upset at all.

“Oh my god, that’s great! My best friend and my sister! Dude, we’re gonna be brother-in-laws”

“Okay, let’s slow down” You say, not wanting to scare Eddie off and you’re also extremely surprised at his sudden reaction shift.

“Oh, c’mon babe, we are so gonna be brother-in-laws” He leans down to pull you into a kiss

“Alright, gross. I don’t need visuals of you two, I’m still having nightmares about the hickey I saw on your neck a while ago”

You hide your face, embarrassed.

“I desperately need a beer after that. Robin, help me grab drinks for everyone” Steve and Robin disappear, leaving you and Eddie alone.

“So, cats outta the bag” You wrap your arms around Eddie’s torso and his hands fall to your hips.

“Dustin’s gonna be so pumped. He’s been waiting on me to make my move on you forever”

“That’s what you’re thinking about right now? Dustin?” You both laugh

“Sorry, the little dude’s just got a way about him. It’s kinda freaky”

You move your arms to drape around his neck and look into his eyes.

He leans down to kiss you because that’s something you can do now without fear of getting caught.

“I love that I can do that whenever and wherever now”

“Hmm, think Steve will still have a problem with that”

“Who cares? Don’t know if you heard but he’s gonna be my brother-in-law”

“Think we can sneak off to my room?”

“Oh, yeah. We’re super sneaky”

Steve and Robin don’t say a word when they catch you and Eddie sneaking through your bedroom window.

Turns out neither of you are as sneaky as you think.

[happiest-hotch]

Appreciation

a/n: so i was watching Don't Worry, Darling for the first time and all I could think about was the dining room table scene with Aaron, so I had to write it

Summary: You cook your husband dinner and he makes sure you get the appreciation you deserve

CW: oral sex (fem receiving)

WC: 1.5k

There's an evergrowing list of things you love about your life post-BAU. The reason you had to go into WITSEC was terrifying, and it changed your world and perception of security, but now that you're out of protective custody, things are better than ever.

Vermont being so beautiful helps, as does the lack of stress from Aaron choosing not to return to Quantico and his endless list of Unit Chief duties. After being with Aaron for a crazy six years, the slower-paced life is perfect. There are no missed dates and mutual guilt because Aaron always felt terrible for canceling last minute, and you felt bad that he felt bad. 

One of your favorite things is when he comes back from work. There's more than enough money between his FBI 'retirement' and your shared investments for him not to work, but he's thrived off structure for so many years that he's not ready to give it up. His hours are nothing like when he was at the BAU. There are no missed holidays, and he's never missed a school event of Jack's.

That morning, Aaron told you he'd be home 'late,' which is 6 pm these days, not 2 am. Although Fridays are date nights, you like surprising him, and you've got a few extra hours, so it seems like the perfect chance to make a more elaborate meal.

You're just turning off the oven to let the roast sit when you hear Aaron's key in the door. Excitedly, you skip over to greet him. 

"Hey, handsome." You say with a grin. Aaron in a suit is a pleasure you get to see every day.

He puts his bag and keys down on the side table. "It smells amazing in here." He notes. "Did you make a pork roast?"

You nod, not having the time to answer before he kisses you. Unlike the peck you were expecting, his lips are firm against yours as he walks you back through the house with his hands on your hips.

"With roast vegetables?" He checks when he pulls back, his lips only an inch from yours. 

"Mhm." You agree, but you can't tell him what specific vegetables you've cooked before he kisses you again. You're boring together, but you usually have a routine: a welcome home kiss, a drink, maybe some hugs in the kitchen, and dinner. His affection isn't anything new or unwanted, but it's notable.

"And those nice brussel sprouts?" He asks. 

You have to grab his face to move it away from yours so you can actually answer. "Yeah, because the only way you'll at them is with cheese."

Aaron kisses you firmly again, guiding you until your butt hits the table. "You love me." He sing-songs teasingly. 

You chuckle. "Yeah, I love you." 

"Good because I love you too." He replies sweetly. 

Then he's kissing you again with renewed vigor, and you're slightly stunned by his boldness. His hands drift from your waist to the back of your thighs, hoisting you up onto the table with ease. On instinct, your thighs spread to let him stand between them.

"Mmm." You mumble against his lips, pulling back for some air. "What's gotten into you?"

"What? I can't thank my darling wife for a delicious homecooked meal?" He wonders, making it easy for you to identify what's made his eyes darken. "Jack's out, right?"

You brush your nose against his with a soft smile that he mimics. "He is, but how do you know it's going to be delicious?" You joke. 

Aaron chuckles, quickly coming up with a witty reply. "I'll thank you for the effort then." He decides.

You grin. "Alright, get to it." 

He winks, planting another kiss on your lips before sinking down to his knee. 

You're thanking yourself for wearing a dress that gives him quick access when he bunches the skirt further up your thighs. 

He starts with gentle kisses trailing up your inner thighs, designed to be loving and teasing. Your skin heats with his mouth on it.

"Someone had after-dinner plans for tonight." He teases, fingers tracing along your underwear- your lacy white underwear- to accentuate his point.

"The order wasn't important." You say through pressed-together lips to keep from moaning. 

His laugh pushes warm air against your core, making you tense on reflex. "Relax, baby." He instructs. "Let me take care of you."

You lay back, getting ready for what'll no doubt be a mindblowing orgasm. Aaron pushes your panties to the side, fingertip tracing over your most delicate skin. You can feel him smirking at how you quiver, completely at his mercy. Because this technically is your reward, he doesn't excessively tease you, and you barely have a few seconds before his lips are right where you need them. He starts with slow kisses up and down your slit before his tongue finally dives in, making you gasp.

"Fuck, Aaron." You moan as his tongue darts around, tasting every inch of you. "Feels so good."

Your praises make him double his efforts, pressing firmer into you with his tongue. Your walls flutter around him, but it doesn't do anything to dissuade his work as he keeps lapping you up. 

You card your hand through Aaron's hair, tugging him closer to you, and he gets the message. He moves his head from side to side, brushing his nose against your clit and making you squeal with delight. Like the expert at working your body that he is, he focuses on a different part of you, licking a fat strip with his tongue flat against you before reaching your clit. He anticipates your next move as well because his hand has been ghosting over your thigh, knowing you'd tease and try to close them, so when you do, he grips your thigh, spreading you again. 

"Baby." He growls in his low, warning tone. "Keep your thighs spread." 

"Okay." You agree, biting your bottom lip to keep from moaning at his hot breath fanning your clit. 

He notices because, of course, he does. "And I want to hear every one of those beautiful moans." To test that you're going to follow his instruction, his lips latch onto your clit, sucking firmly, and your jaw drops open, and a loud moan falls out.

Satisfied with you, he keeps the same movement going, focusing all his attention on your bundle of nerves, cycling between sucking and blowing and licking, with no order. You're screaming a mix of his name and curse words above him, feeling pleasure stream through your body. There's no doubt a proud smirk on his face, but your eyes are so tightly shut from the bliss that you can't see it.

"Please don't stop." You whimper, subconsciously rolling your hips against his face as you chase your high. 

"Ready to take my fingers?" He asks, his voice all low and deep against you.

"Please." You whimper out, overcome by the pleasure but still wanting more. As his middle finger slightly nudges you, you grip the edge of the table. He momentarily pulls off your clit, forcing you to focus on the feel of his fingers. He's swift with his motion to push it deep into you, resulting in a loud moan falling from your lips. His ring finger joins, stretching you open, and you silently thank the universe that he's part of the ten percent of left-handed people because the coldness of his wedding ring against your warm core is a delightful contrast.

You see stars when he starts to move his fingers, thrusting them in and out of you. "So good." You manage to moan out as you arch your back. 

"Here." He offers out his free hand to you, and you stop gripping the table's edge to hold it. You know he likes to feel how much pleasure he's giving you, so you squeeze it as he works you. 

His lips reattach to your clit, giving you so much bliss from both places, and you scream out as you get closer. 

"A-Aaron, I need to- shit- cum." You say, words no doubt slurred together. 

He knows, and he knows how to get you over the edge. "Mm-hmm." He mumbles against you. The added vibrations are enough to do it, making you moan his name while squirming on the table as you reach your high. He works you through it, lips, fingers, and tongue not letting up until you're gasping at the overstimulation.

Spent, you lay against the table as Aaron readjusts your underwear and dress before standing up. 

"That good, huh?" He asks despite knowing that, yeah, it really was that good. 

"Absolutely." You agree, letting him pull you upright with the hand you're holding his with. He leans in to kiss you, and you can taste yourself on his lips. "Thank you." 

"Thank you." He says. "Do you think dinner's burnt by now?" 

You shake your head, hopping off the table. His hands hold your hips, helping support your unstable legs. "The oven was off, so it's just probably cold." You assure him before smirking. "Oh, I meant to ask, since that was just appreciation for me cooking, what do I get if the meal actually is delicious?"

Aaron chuckles. "We'll see, but I have a feeling you've already got some requests." 

[jaegeraether]

Sunsets and footballers (Part 9)

Lucy Bronze x Reader (9)

Masterlist (other parts here)

The sun was just starting to peak through the curtains when YFN’s phone rang.

“It’s Dory..” she gasped.

Lucy lifted her head with a groan, her mouth popping off her clit. “Don’t you fucking dare.”

YFN gave her a defiant look and answered the call. Lucy tried to start again, earning her a slap on the hand gripping her thigh.

“Hi Dory!”

“Hey mate! I haven’t had any date updates, are you free today?” YFN looked down at Lucy as she laid naked between her legs, watching her closely. Her head was cradled in her hands and her feet were kicking back and forth in the air like a child. What am I going to do with you? YFN thought with a fuzzy warm feeling inside her.

“Um… yeah.. about that.”

Lucy licked her gently from her wet hole, up to her throbbing clit. She jerked and gave her a stern look. Lucy replied with an innocent but obvious ‘that’s what you get’ look.

YFN reached down and took her hand, tangling their fingers to give Lucy the attention she wanted.

“Oh god… Lucy’s there right now isn’t she?”

“Uh… possibly.”

“Did you just answer the phone to me during sex?!”

“She sure did!” Lucy said loud enough for Jordan to hear.

YFN cringed. “Yes, I’ll be free today. But there’s not really much date to talk about to be honest..”

“Oh my god it just keeps getting worse. I’m hanging up.”

Lucy grabbed the phone. “Jords, it’s me. You can pick her up in an hour. I have training and I’ll be done with her then anyways.”

YFN sat up on her elbows and her mouth dropped open. She swore she could hear Jordan’s do the same. She slapped Lucy’s arm.

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Just joking, I’ll never be done with her. But she’ll be free in an hour…. Jords?” She laughed, throwing the phone back onto the bed. “She hung up but knowing her, she’ll be here in an hour.”

“It’s scary how comfortable we already are with each other.”

Lucy grinned and kissed the inside of her thigh from her knee, back to YFN’s wet mess.

Lucy didn’t want to leave. Last night through to the morning had been the best time she’d had in her life. She’d never felt so seen, so loved, so able to be herself. Shit, she’d fallen hard and somehow, she was still falling.

“Maybe I should call her and cancel..” YFN whispered. They were fresh out of the shower and somehow had managed to put clothes on and not take them back off.

Lucy threw her head back and laughed. “You are not cancelling with Jordan because you can’t walk.”

YFN’s pressed her lips together, dimple slightly appearing. Her cheeks were red.

Lucy continued. “Go on, show me.”

She sighed and walked from Lucy to the other side of the room and back with a noticeable soreness. Lucy grinned, proud of herself. “Barely a limp.”

“I think it’s more accurately described as a waddle.” YFN pouted, embarrassed. “She’s traumatised.”

Lucy stepped close and gently cupped her soreness with the full palm of her hand. She leant forward and brushed her lips along her cheek to her ear and whispered huskily. “Don’t say it wasn’t worth it.”

YFN’s eyes closed, her hand brushed over the back of Lucy’s and she rubbed her cheek softly against hers. She turned, her lips parting on her cheek and just as Lucy thought she was about to say something cute she whispered. “You’re being cocky, Lucia.”

Lucy’s eyelids fluttered and her heart skipped a beat. If she didn’t know YFN like she did, she would have thought it was a warning, but she knew she loved her cocky.

She removed her hand, albeit a little grudgingly, and tangled their fingers. The relationship they shared was very much a complicated entanglement of sexual attraction and romantics, and it fit them both so perfectly that it was easy to switch between the two. She shivered at the feel of YFN’s lips on her jaw and had to muster up a lot of strength to pull away.

“Minimal walking today, please. Let me know where to pick you up from for our little date tonight.” Lucy was excited for their date. She’d said she was going to surprise her, but she didn’t know with what yet. She had so many ideas for what to do for their first date. Her main priority was that they didn’t have sex. They were romantics, after all, and wanted to get to know each other.

YFN smiled, squeezing her hand. “Message me when you’re free? Dory and I will most likely still be out by then.”

Lucy kissed her little dimple, nodding too eagerly against her face and YFN chuckled.

“It’s just so good to meet another Aussie. Little bit disappointed you don’t know the Tillies though.” Caitlin joked.

“Heeeey mate, I know the Tillies! I just… haven’t been to any games. You know what it’s like in Australia! It’s all footy and swimming.” YFN defended, becoming more Australian around a fellow Australian. “But I do hear you’re pretty amazing. You have a massive fan base.”

They’d just followed each other on Instagram and YFN paled at her 250k followers.

“Suck up,” she laughed and shoved her shoulder lightly.

The trio were sat in the stands watching Ireland play their last match of the international break. Jordan was good friends with Caitlin and Katie from her Arsenal days, and they used to live together.

“Oh shit.” YFN gasped as Katie tackled a player late. She wasn’t given a yellow, but she was warned and smiled at the referee as she was being told off.

“Aw, should have been a yellow to be fair.” Jordan laughed.

“You want her to get a yellow?” YFN enquired.

“Oh god no, but Katie being Katie always gets yellow carded. Past 10 matches in a row, isn’t it chicken?”

Caitlin nodded, clapping with the crowd. “Yep. But I think I lost count.”

“Katie McCard! Katie McCard!” Chanting started coming from the crowd and Katie gave them a cheeky look with a ‘shhh’ gesture.

The game continued and Katie was the most aggressive on the pitch. Caitlin was getting worked up and shouted every time someone tried to challenge Katie while Jordan and YFN laughed. Eventually Katie scored an absolute banger, smashing a left-footed long ball from outside the box. She ran over to the green Irish crowd, standing in front of the trio and put her arms out, listening to the crowds screaming for her. She winked at the trio. Her players quickly leapt on her and dragged her back into play.

The crowd was chanting for the rest of the match a loud and catchy song for Katie. “WE’VE GOT MCCABE. KATIE MCCABE. I JUST DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND. SHE PLAYS OUT ON THE WING. SHE HITS IT WITH A ZING. WE’VE GOT KATIE MCCABE.”

The chant was so catchy that all three of them were chanting with them amongst the deafening Irish supporters.

The game remained 1-0 and in the last 2 minutes, Katie was yellow-carded for an extra late tackle. She put her hands up in acknowledgement and jogged away from the referee grinning to herself. The crowd loved it more than her goal.

YFN admitted she was beginning to love the sport even more.

When Katie finished with her interview, she came over to the trio and gave both Caitlin and Jordan hugs, turning to YFN.

“Hiya! Nice to meet ya, I’m Katie. How’re ya doin’?” Her Irish accent was strong as she dragged YFN into a hug. “Caity and I have been dyin’ to meet ya, chicken has told us so much about ya!”

“All good things I hope.” YFN laughed.

“All good mate, all good. And to be honest with ya, every Aussie I’ve met is just top notch.”

“God those are some high expectations to live up to! You’ve been to Australia, right?”

“Oh yeah, World Cup last year. It was grand to tell ya the truth. I enjoyed it.”

“And still you’re just as pale,” Caitlin laughed.

Katie smacked her, flirting. “Have you seen my teammates, chick? I’m the tannest one here!”

They joined the Irish team at a pub to celebrate their victory, YFN meeting the whole team and their respective partners. They celebrated and bantered and YFN let herself have a few drinks and let go a little. Somewhere amongst her few drinks, the trio found themselves in a corner booth and they began teasing YFN about Lucy. They kept it private, respecting her privacy and just keeping it amongst the four of them. Katie and Caitlin knew very little about Lucy. She was private and kept her friends close. Jordan was respectful of that too, though most of what they knew about her was from Jordan. They knew Lucy had been single for a little while, and they knew her as an extremely competitive person but also someone who was respected and helped people, especially younger players. YFN thought they both seemed to admire Lucy, the way they spoke about her, and that made her heart swell a little bit with pride for her.

She missed her, a lot. She’d tried to distract herself all day amongst new friends, but Lucy was right there at the front of her mind. She told herself she was just a bit sex hungover from the night before, but she knew that was only a small part of it. She was falling.

YFN took her phone out to see it was overwhelmed with notifications. The trio had posted and reposted several photos together and tagged YFN. Her phone was blowing up and she could barely swipe without another notification popping up. She tried to stop the notifications but didn’t know how. She managed to open the most important ones, the messages from Lucy.

Lucy: The Irish girls know how to drink, be careful x

*Lucy Bronze MBE started following you.*

Lucy: Training finishing soon. Would you still like our date tonight?

Lucy: Having fun, are we?

The messages were recent, but she still felt bad she had become so distracted.

YFN: Yes, 1000% yes, I still want our date. You can come pick me up from the pub, or I can meet you somewhere?

YFN pressed send and a phone buzzed. She felt a presence and looked up from her phone, her eyes meeting Lucy’s. She was standing there in her football gear; white trainers, blue shorts, and her pale pink and blue England puffer jacket on. She’d managed to take out her contacts though and her green eyes shone mischievously behind her clear glasses. She purposely looked at her phone to read the message and then pocketed it, looking back at YFN.

“Hi, little one.” She held eye contact for a few seconds, relishing the look of surprise on her face before she looked at the trio who had fallen silent, watching the sexual tension unfold. “Mind if I join?”

“Hey mate!” Jordan jumped up and wrapped her arms around Lucy. “Missed you.”

Lucy gave her a strong hug back. “Alright, Jords?”

“Yeah, we had a great day. You’ve met Katie and Caitlin haven’t you?”

“Briefly I think,” she leant over the table and clapped hands with them both.

“Ohhhh, looks like we have an enemy in camp!” Katie laughed, a little tipsy, as Lucy had been cocky enough to wear her England kit to an Irish pub full of Irish players in kit.

“Attenzione pickpocket!” One of the Irish girls yelled from across the room.

The pub cracked up as Lucy slid into the booth to the left of YFN, her hand immediately going to grab the top of her right thigh with a reassuring squeeze. YFN loved this. She was possessive and not afraid to show it. Her arm across her body was welcomed and YFN felt natural to put one of her hands on Lucy’s, the other wrapping around her arm and resting on the outside of her bicep.

“How was training?” She asked, genuinely interested.

Lucy gestured to her knee which was bandaged. “Going to need an ice bath I think.”

YFN loved the way she said ‘bath’ like it ended with an ‘f’ instead of a ‘th’. She wanted to help her, to massage it or do something but was worried she’d do the wrong thing. Instead, she placed her hand on her knee and gently stroked it through the bandages reassuringly. She caught Lucy’s eye and saw a deep unrequited love there before Lucy managed to catch herself and looked away, smiling.

“Will you be right to play tomorrow, Luce?” Jordan asked.

She nodded. “Should do. I had a good chat with Sarina. Just need to rest my knee.”

“Can you play the whole 90?” Caitlin asked, curious.

“If my knee can take it. They can stretcher me off otherwise.”

Lucy caught YFN’s look of admiration and pride. Lucy shook her head as if to remind herself that yes, this is real and yes, she is just that amazing.

“So, what’s this then?” Katie asked a little slurred, gesturing between the two. The other two looked as if they wished she hadn’t.

Lucy and YFN both went to answer at the same time and cut each other off.

“No, you go ahead. I want to know what you were going to say.” Lucy teased, her thumb stroking her thigh in support.

“Way to put me on the spot,” she blushed. “I don’t think either of us know yet. We’re both just going with the flow.”

“I set them up though,” Jordan winked, proudly.

“Did you just?” Lucy said sceptically. “Please, tell us more.”

“Well I did buy you two that toy-” She said innocently but caught herself, slapping her hand up to her mouth with wide eyes.

Katie burst out into a loud laugh, holding her stomach while Caitlin’s mouth dropped before she started laughing with Katie.

 “I think you’ve had too much to drink, chicken,” Caitlin managed to get out.

Lucy looked to YFN to see if she was upset by Jordan’s comment. She only seemed a little embarrassed as she turned to Lucy. “But how did you know..” she stopped herself and pursed her lips, intending on continuing the question later.

“I told Lucy I’d bought it as a joke and stashed it at the bottom of your shopping bag.” Jordan snorted, now on her back like a bug, laughing as the other two wiped away tears.

“Okay Jords, I think you need some food to sober you up a bit,” Lucy said, giving her a disapproving look.

“Yeah you’re right. I’ll get some snacks for the table!”

“Ai, we need another round o’ drinks, we’ll be back in two. Can we getcha anything?” Katie asked.

Lucy and YFN shook their heads. When they were gone, YFN turned to Lucy who had her head leaning back against the booth, looking at her. “Well, you found me.”

“The bar was tagged on Instagram,” Lucy said, waiting to see if she thought she’d been too forward by seeing it online and coming. YFN didn’t seem phased and if she was being honest with herself, she actually really liked Lucy’s persistence. She felt present and supportive to her.

“I have the feeling you’ll always find me,” she said, also leaning her head back. “Would you like to go..?”

Lucy looked a little unsure and spoke softly, careful with her words. “I was actually going to ask you if we could do it another time.. my mood is not great with my knee playing up before tomorrow and I sort of want our first date to be perfect?”

“Oh Luce..”

“I don’t want to ruin this,” she whispered.

“But you came and found me anyways.”

“I needed to see you,” her husky voice gave YFN so much joy.

“I’m glad you came. We don’t have to do the date tonight, but we can still spend time together? I can cook dinner for you while you rest your knee..”

Lucy looked like she could cry. “I don’t want to be that person who brings down your mood. You look like you’re having fun with the girls.”

“They’re great, yes, but I will always rather be with you, regardless of your mood. I can see you’re stressed and upset. Let me ease some of that burden..”

Lucy sighed and thought. She was being offered the world by the person she wanted more than anything else in the world. She fought an internal battle of not wanting YFN to see her like this, and also wanting to just let go and let her in. “It’s taking a lot of effort to not show how stressed I am right now with my knee..”

YFN reached out and touched her face gently before her eyes flicked to the crowded bar and she pulled back. Lucy caught her wrist and pulled her hand back to her face. She didn’t mind the public display of affection. “I know.” She murmured. “Now let’s say goodbye and go back to yours so I can make you some food and ease some stress, okay? Raincheck on our first date.”

Lucy wasn’t being very vocal apart from the whimpers and ragged breathing, but YFN didn’t need that to know she was enjoying herself. She was practically dripping right into her mouth. The ice pack YFN had put on Lucy’s knee was resting on her shoulder lightly, cooling it.

“I… I... I..”

YFN lifted her head to give Lucy a moment of respite to use words. “Luce?”

“I didn’t want to have sex with you tonight.”

The comment could have been taken the wrong way, but YFN knew what she meant and smiled, tilting her head.

“That’s not what I meant. I meant, I said to myself we weren’t going to because I wanted to make sure we both knew it wasn’t just about the sex.”

YFN held eye contact as she leaned forward and brushed her lips over Lucy’s folds. “I think we both already know this is much more than that. Now, Luce, I need you to do me a favour.”

She readjusted her glasses as she looked down at YFN. “Anything.”

“I need you to stop fighting your orgasm. It’s okay. You’re allowed to be the one receiving. You’re allowed to enjoy yourself. And I promise that I’m really loving this too.”

Lucy almost came the moment her lips had touched her, and she was tense, trying to not show her vulnerability. But YFN was right. This was much needed stress relief before the game.

“It’s… hard for me. I’m not used to this..”

“I know, love. It’s okay, I have an idea.” YFN left the room for a few seconds and reappeared with some headphones. “I want you to wear these. I’m going to play some music for you so we can drown out some of the outside stressors.” She knelt on the bed next to a gloriously naked and wet Lucy Bronze and put the headphones gently over her ears, queuing up a few songs that would be perfect for the mood. Lucy looked up at her little dimply face with love and appreciation. She was right, a mountain of stress disappeared, replaced by soothing music. Bending down, she pressed a soft kiss to her lips, leaving her wanting more. She gave a questioning thumbs up to Lucy who nodded in response.

YFN settled back down and eased Lucy back into it with kisses and strokes over her body, focussing heavily on her knee and as close to it as she could get with the ice pack. She gently placed it over her shoulder and her lips again found Lucy. She knew Lucy wasn’t used to being put in a position like this where she was receiving, let alone the only receiver, and so she didn’t attempt to put her fingers inside of her. She did, however, push her tongue inside of her multiple times. She couldn’t resist. Lucy seemed to like this. She fucked her eagerly with her mouth, tempted to touch herself as she did. But she didn't. This was about Lucy. Lucy's undoing came with YFN’s work sucking and licking her clit. It put her into such a state that her back was arched hard against the bed, her body still resisting. YFN’s hands gripped her hips to ground her as she found Lucy’s most sensitive area and harassed it with her tongue. Lucy was more vocal when she couldn’t hear. Her groaning and whimpering and swearing filled the room, her hands gripping the bed hard either side of them, the bedsheets balled in her fists. She came when YFN’s hands stroked gently up her sides from her hips to her hardened nipples. She clenched hard as she came, her thighs squeezing YFN’s head, but she made sure she could continue sucking slower and slower to bring her down gently.

Lucy’s gasping and swearing was so loud that she would have worried if they were in an apartment, or hotel. Her body slumped onto the bed, her thighs releasing, arms outstretched.

YFN cleaned her up and tucked them under the covers, pulling Lucy to her. Lucy didn't fight it, she was far too tired. Half of her body was on top, and her head was up against YFN’s, hair wild and loose. The stress relief that had come from the shattering orgasm had her well and truly relaxed.

“Please come to my game tomorrow...” She murmured, and YFN wondered if she were sleep-talking.

“I’ll be there, Luce.” She reassured with a whisper and a kiss to her forehead. Lucy’s breathing changed to signal she was sleeping then.

This was the other Lucy. The rare one. Not the dominant and controlling one, this was the part of her she thought was broken, the part she thought no one could love, and no one was allowed to see. This was the reason she was so fiercely strong and independent, to compensate for the side of her that just wanted to be loved and accepted. The part that swung arms with her mascot and took care of the new kids in the squad. This was her core. Everything else was just.. symptom.

YFN stroked her hair until she too fell asleep, her lips gently touching Lucy’s forehead.

[wastemanjohn]

TW misogyny emotional abuse sexual assault

i am not going to use the term 4b movement for this post because I have recently become aware it has problematic/transphobic associations. however the idea of decentering men - not dating men, not marrying men, not having sex with men, not having children with men - is gaining traction for a reason. it was gaining traction before the US election, and after yesterday - well. i don't need to explain do i?

it's terrifying. the hatred of women. the enjoyment of the hatred of women, the revelling in the hatred. the women who join in with the hatred, maybe thinking they're different. maybe thinking they'll be spared from it. that they can camouflage, hide somehow.

it won't work.

on a more individual level, so many of us have fucking had enough. we are tired. we are sick of the podcast bros demeaning us for our "body counts." we are done with the constant policing and control of what we do with our bodies, and in america's case the very real and terrifying threat to life and health that has arisen from that. we are done with the daily objectification, humiliation and harassment. we are done with weaponised incompetence, we are done with having our careers and areas of knowledge mansplained to us, we are done with being sluts and prudes and always being wrong no matter what.

can you blame us? can you really fucking blame us?

men are conditioned to hate us. some recognise that and work on it. unfortunately, many, many more do not.

the first time i heard labour by paris paloma i bawled my eyes out and couldn't entirely understand why.

the first time i read the husband stitch by carmen maria machado i bawled my eyes out and couldn't entirely understand why.

i understand now.

i think many of us have quietly stopped dating men before we even knew there was a movement around it. at least it seems that way to me. but just speaking on my own experience - i haven't really been dating men since early 2023. i briefly dated men again a few months back; i abruptly stopped because it sucked. because, hand on my heart, since i stopped dating men - i have never been happier, freer, and more secure in myself. i have never been more fucking content.

my life is beautiful now. i have my wonderful friendships. i have my loving bonkers family. i have my career, i have my aspirations, i have my wealth of interests and hobbies, i have my beautiful (four legged) sons. all of these things are so much sweeter when i can enjoy them in peace.

peace; when i'm not picking up after him because he can't be bothered to walk two feet to put his dirty underwear in the laundry basket. when i'm not heartbroken for months because i thought i was going to marry him but he had another long term girlfriend and a whole other life that he kept secret from me for so embarrassingly long. when i'm not doing mental gymnastics to excuse that time he made jokes about my sexual abuse, when he was the first person i really told, or the time he didn't comfort me and didn't understand why i was so upset when another ex of mine was in court for viewing CSAM. when i'm not spending another weekend alone due to him cancelling at the last minute yet again for his mates. when i'm not feeling vulnerable and confused because we've negotiated a scene and he purposely crosses my limits because it's hot to him (so many times). when i dont have to listen to everyone say what a nice guy he is but he's been pressuring me for nudes for the last two weeks.

when he can't handle my proportionate emotions and suggests i'm just being mentally ill when i'm trying to communicate that he's hurt me. when he tells me it's a good thing i've taken up dance because i'll get more toned and be able to open my legs wider. when he drives really fast and erratic because he's pissed off with me and wants to scare me. when he lies to me about having huntington's disease so i won't break up with him.

every one of these is a different guy BTW. and this is just off the top of my head.

how many stories do you have?

anyway 100/10 highly recommend being a spinster with cats. society hates strong, self assured women who can make it alone. i have never wanted to be that woman more.

and no - before anyone comes at me I am not saying all men are monsters or that only men are abusive. i do not hate men just for being men. i have some great men in my life as friends and family. i am merely making the right choice for me based on my experiences, based on how hostile the current climate is towards women, and i support the fuck out of anyone who is doing or wants to do the same. sorrows and fucking prayers to anyone who has a problem with that.

i don't see why i should keep my experiences to myself. why any of us should.

my DMs are open for anyone who needs someone to talk to about this stuff.